I'll break this into three parts: the Flash-Sideways, the Jack-Hurley stuff, and the Claire stuff.
Flash Sideways
The episode begins by showing us a few framed photos of the Shepherd family, revealing that this is a Jack-centric episode, thus furthering the replica lineup of episodes from season one (plane, plane, Kate, Locke, Jack). That means next week should be a Sun episode, and since the episode is titled 'Sundown' I think that's pretty likely. But more on that later.
Jack prompty removes his shirt, as he does in all Jack-centric episodes, and walks around his house half-nude. Looking in the mirror he notices a scar that seems to confuse him, exactly the way he was confused by the cut on his neck on flight 815. This is the only hint the writers have really given that there's any connection between Timelines A and B.
Jack's mom calls to ask about Christian's missing coffin, and we don't find anything out except that it may be in Berlin. Momma Shepherd can't find Christian's will, so Jack volunteers to head over and look for it. But first, he has to pick his son up from school.
Wait, what?? Jack has a son now?? Of course he does.
So apparently Timeline B Jack got busy in his early twenties and had a son, and then named him after the most famous ‘shepherd’ in history, King David. (Who, like Jack’s son, was also a talented musician.) David positively can’t stand his father and I can’t blame him. Despite Jack’s sometimes good intentions, he would be one heck of an annoying dad. Demanding information all the time, drinking all the time, feeling bad about himself. All the time. Ugh.
Throughout the flash-sideways, Jack struggles with his failures as a father, and desperately wants to sit down and eat pizza with his son. Along the way, we find out that Christian left something to Claire in his will, which will be interesting since Claire is presently in Los Angeles and this will give her and Jack the chance to meet. We also see a couple references to LOST’s favorite literary work, Alice in Wonderland. Jack talks to David about Alice’s two cats, Snowball and Kitty. (Snowball was white. Kitty was black.)
We see some sheet music from a piano piece by Chopin, the same piece that a young Daniel Faraday played in ‘The Variable.” After finding Cristian's will but losing his son in the process, Jack goes over to David’s mother’s house, and while we don’t figure out who she is, my only guess is Juliet. Jack follows the clues to a piano recital, where he finds David and also runs into none other than his Japanese samurai friend from another life.
Dogan doesn’t say anything important but it was pretty cool to see him. So if you’re keeping track at home, we have now seen Ethan, Ben, and Dogan in consecutive weeks, all three of whom should have been on the island in 2004. Who will we see next? Jacob? Richard? A normal version of Rousseau?? The eyepatch guy? Horace? Phil? Roger Linus? The possibilities are endless. But we've GOT to see Juliet.
At the end of the episode, Jack finally realizes that the key to successful parenthood is just good old fasion love, and after confessing his unashamed love for his son, they finally set off to eat that pizza Jack has been thinking about all night. Happy ending for all.
As stupid and pointless as Timeline B is, I’ve decided to just go with the flow and wait for the big surprise moment. It may not be until the season finale, but I’m sure it will be awesome.
The Lighthouse
The on-island storyline begins with Jack and Dogan having an honest conversation, where they tell each other how much they appreciate each other’s honesty. Meanwhile Hurley and Miles play tic-tac-toe and Hurley decides to go in the temple for something to eat. Of course he does.
Hurley sees ghost-Jacob sitting by the dirty pool, and the secret mission begins. It's evident that Jacob is the master of manipulation and he knows it; in fact he seems to know just about everything there is to know about the loveable Losties, including the phrase that has haunted Jack Shepherd since childhood: "You don't have what it takes."
Jorge Garcia does an amazing job of balancing his role as a serious guy with serious issues and the best comedic relief character on the show. He is terrific in this episode. Particularly in the scene where Dogan tells Hurley to buzz off, but Hurley tells him in a totally unsure voice "I'm a candidate, I can do whatever I want." Brilliant.
In case you're wondering what Dogan muttered in Japansese as he walked away, it was something like "You're lucky I have to protect you, because otherwise I'd cut off your head."
Nice.
So Jack and Hurley trek throug the jungle, and along the way the encounter Kate, who finally seems to have given up on chasing Sawyer. She states that now she's going to find Claire. Why Kate just automatically assumes Claire is alive, even though no one has seen her or heard from her in 3 years and she's on a freaky crazy island, is beyond me. But since when did any of Kate's actions make a shred of sense.
J & H keep walking, and they pass the caves from season two, where the audience is reminded of Adam and Eve and once again asks: who are they? Speculation about their identities has been all over the board, but don't worry, I have the answer.
A couple seasons ago, Damon and Carlton (the show's producers) stated that there is a secret anagram hidden in the episode "Not In Portland" that reveals the identities of Adam and Eve.
In that episode, when Carl is being brainwashed in room 23, there is a voice that when played backwards says "Only fools are enslaved by time and space." If you mix those letters around, it says "Bones of Nadlers may lay lost deep in cave." And since Rose and Bernard's last name is Nadler, we have our answer.
Especially because on top of Adam and Eve is a black stone and a white stone. You know, Rose is black, Bernard is white. It makes sense. Case closed.
Before they reach the lighthouse, Jack and Hugo share a quick heart-to-heart about why they returned to the island, and Matthew Fox delievers in a big way, which is a rare LOST moment. He tells Hurley "Because I was broken. And I was stupid enough to think this place could fix me."
Little do you know Jack.
After they walk a few more minutes they stumble upon a huge brick lighthouse which makes all LOST fans ask the question: How the EFF did no one ever see that before? Especially if it's a two second walk from where they used to live? Whatever, this show stopped making sense a long time ago.
Inside the lighthouse we saw one of the coolest LOST scenes ever, which definitely rivaled and maybe even surpassed the cave from the week before. The numbers and the mirrors and the dial ... Of course Jack had to lose his temper and break the magic mirrors with a stick. But we've come to expect nothing less from Jack.
Ghost-Jacob then shows up again and basically tells Hurley that he got exactly the reaction from Jack that he wanted. He also says that "someone very bad" is about to go to the temple (Flocke - in case you're a total nimrod) and he had to get them out of there.
There were a few candidate names and numbers that weren't seen in the cave, most important Kate Austen, number 51. We also saw Burke (Juliet), Rousseau, Faraday, Lewis (Charlotte), Friendly and Price (others), Dawson (Michael), and the ever-important #108 - Wallace.
Who is Wallace?!? I don't have any idea. But his name was crossed out.
Did you notice that Jack's name was written considerably bigger and bolder than the other names? Was that intentional? Is that because Jacob is more invested in Jack than the other candidates? Probably. Does that have anything to do with Christian Shepherd? Was Christian a candidate??
If there's anything major to take away from the Jack-Hurley-Lighthouse action, it's that Jacob is my new favorite character and everything he does is awesome. And that this whole "Candidate" business is more important than we even realized.
Claire's Camp
Maybe the best way to analyze these scenes would be by simply reading the script on paper, because watching Emilie de Ravin try to act is simply too painful and distracting. This was hands-down the worst acting performance in LOST history, closely followed by all the other appearances by Claire in prior seasons. Now I see why they made her disappear for two seasons. Good Lord was she bad. I couldn't even understand what she was saying half the time.
Honestly, they could have found any random girl in a shopping mall, let her memorize lines for 2 hours, messed up her hair and gave her a prop axe, and basically filmed the exact same scene. Poor Jin was stuck there watching that. Dreadful.
Forgetting about all that, we basically saw Claire act the way Rousseau used to - paranoid, delusional, angry. But with a twist of psychopathic. It was revealed at the end of the episode that she has actually been friends with the Nemesis for some time, and seems to be operating under his control. It's safe to say that Claire was his first "recruit."
But when Flocke entered Claire's camp, it made me wonder "What happened to Sawyer?!"
We'll find out soon hopefully.
Other Stuff
There was a poster of the band The Who in David Shepherd's room. They had a song called "Smash the Mirror." He also had a poster of a band called Meat Coat - the band that Charlie was excited to open for when he was a member of Driveshaft.
Sayid and Miles are the only Losties left at the temple. Kate, Sawyer, Jack and Hurley have all snuck away. Man, those others are stupid.
Next week is a Sun/Jin episode which means we'll be seeing plenty of Sun's uninteresting storyline on the island. (Not that her flash-sideways is going to be a thrill either.) If her and Jin don't reunite, I might kill someone.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
LOST: Season Six
RECAP OF THE FIRST FOUR EPISODES
-LA X Part 1
-LA X Part 2
-What Kate Does
-The Substitute
In every season of LOST thus far, the main concept of the season has been revealed in the first moments of the first episode. Season one: plane crash. Season two: the hatch. Season three: the others. Season four: rescue. And season five: time travel.
So what is it for season six? So far I would say it can be summed up as: alternative timelines. To which my response was at the time, and still is: What the heck? Really? All the drama of season five and the explosion and Faraday’s research and the result of everything is … alternative timelines, which no one is even aware of except us the audience. For real?
I’m trying to fight off the disappointment and trust the writers that this is going somewhere, but I have to admit I’m not thrilled through the first four episodes. Granted, there’s a lot of LOST remaining and I like the direction we’re headed in with Smoke-Locke and Jacob and the immanent war. But still, Timeline B has about two more episodes to start making some sense before I start punching innocent puppies.
To summarize the events in Timeline B, we begin on the flight of Oceanic 815 where most things are the same, but there are a few subtle differences: Shannon is gone, Hurley claims to be lucky, and Charlie appears to be suicidal. Whatever. The keys in my mind are these: Desmond appears on the plane (possibly only seen by Jack), Christian Shepherd’s body is not on the plane, and Jack seems to be experiencing some sort of déjà vu and has a weird cut on his neck, similar to the bloody spot on Desmond’s neck from when he was time traveling around in The Constant.
We saw Kate miraculously escape from an armed US Marshall using only a pen and her wits, then hijack a cab, befriend it’s frightened occupant, and then escort said occupant to the hospital and help her give birth to a healthy baby boy. I can’t decide what’s less realistic: a time-traveling, monster-infested island in the Pacific, or Kate Austin’s character. Kate tells Claire she’s innocent. Is she? I don’t know, and I don’t care. I just hope we don’t see any more Kate-centric episodes this season.
Elsewhere in Timeline B, John Locke is still paralyzed, still pathetic, but on a happier note, he’s engaged to Helen Norwood and seemingly on good terms with his father – which begs the question, how did he get paralyzed this time? I also wonder, what led him to Australia to go on a Walkabout, since Matthew Abaddon, who works for Widmore, wouldn’t have been there to nudge him in the Walkabout direction, since we can only assume that Widmore is dead. Since landing in LA, Locke has randomly encountered Jack, then Hurley, then Rose, and then Ben Linus, and he won’t let any of them tell him what he can’t do.
Where is Timeline B going? I assume we’ll see episodes centric on Sayid (who will be happy with Nadia), Sun and Jin (miserable as ever) and Sawyer (conning his way through life), but each with little changes here and there. And of course the super-doctor Jack episode, where we’ll find out why Christian’s body wasn’t on the plane and hope it has some relevance to the island and to Jacob. There may be a Hurley episode (although I’m not sure I can handle seeing his mother again) or a Claire episode or even a Ben episode. Frankly, I don’t care about Timeline B until a connection with Timeline A is established.
And with that, let’s move on to the events of Timeline A, beginning at the foot statue with Jacob’s Enemy, also called Flocke (for Fake Locke), Nemesis, Smokie, Dr. Loophole, Esau, or simply The Monster. Early in the first episode, it was revealed beyond any and all possible doubt that Locke and the Monster and Jacob’s Enemy are all one and the same. Not sure if he is possessing him, or using him, or inhabiting him, or simply the Monster has become him. Whatever word you want to use, doesn’t really matter, the bottom line is Locke=Smoke Monster.
Now there’s a slim, 1% chance that the Monster is actually the good guy and Jacob is actually bad, and that would be a cool twist. But I don’t think that’s the case.
Flocke turns into Smokie, destroys ‘Jacob’s bodyguards,’ including Bram, and is impenetrable to bullets. He then delivers the best line of season six: “Sorry you had to see me like that.” Boom!
Ben is freaking out, Richard is freaking out, and Frank Lapidus stands off to the side and makes sarcastic remarks like “Another day in paradise…” or “Guess we’re in for the ride of our lives.” I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty ready for Frank to meet his end. He’s not a terrible character, but what good is a comic-relief guy if he’s not funny? Nemesis then punches Ricardus in the throat, tells the crowd that he is disappointed in them (weird), and insinuates that Richard was originally a slave on the Black Rock, which I’m sure we’ll see in about 7 or 8 episodes. He then carries him off into the jungle, ties him up, and goes “recruiting.” He picks up Sawyer, chases after a 12 year old blond kid (either young Jacob or old Aaron - or both?) and successfully ‘recruits’ Sawyer through some classic LOST-style manipulation.
How freaking awesome was the cave? Beginning with Jacob’s ladder (Genesis reference anyone?) and the white-black scale (reference to Locke’s famous words from all the way back to early season one), and the names on the wall and the numbers. That scene has to be among the greatest of all “Holy Crap!” moments in LOST history. The numbers! They actually mean something! Not sure what … but apparently they correspond to the characters who have stayed alive, and are “candidates.” Are Jin and Sun linked as one ‘Kwon’ – is that why Jacob told them to always value their love and stay together – or does the fact that there’s only one ‘Kwon’ on the wall mean one of them is about to die. Why wasn’t Kate’s name on the wall? Did we just not see it, or is there something to that? Maybe she’s never been a candidate because Jacob knows that she’s a stupid idiot and a terrible actress.
Maybe the reason Kate and Sun aren't Candidates is because they didn't do what Jacob told them to. Remember he told Kate not to steal again, and he told Sun (the cheating whore) not to ever take her love for granted. Maybe that's why their names weren't on the wall?
Now that Sawyer has agreed to “get off this damn island,” what next? They surely aren’t just going to waltz onto a cargo ship. The ticket off the island is through the temple – at least that’s my thought. The immanent war between Jacob and Smokie is going to be over the temple, and fought at the temple. I believe Flocke’s recruitment is for the war, and that would pit Sawyer against his fellow 815ers. And I don’t rule out the possibility of him actually fighting against them, since they are responsible for Juliet’s death. Wouldn’t it be awesome if Sawyer kills Kate!? Oh my gosh!
So that about sums up the Flocke storyline thus far. Which leaves the temple folks, the most important but also most confusing part of season six. Let’s start with this question: how did the blast send 8 individuals to 2007 – but also send them into an alternative timeline? I understand them being sent to their actual present time, but if a second reality was created, how does that factor in? I think season six desperately needs a cameo appearance by Daniel Faraday so he can explain all this to us.
So why was Kate halfway up a tree? That was ridiculous. She shimmies down, Sawyer kicks Jack in the face, Juliet dies right in front of Sawyer’s eyes (for the second time in ten minutes!) and “it worked.”
How did Juliet know it worked? Did her consciousness flash to Timeline B? Is that why she said some weird thing about going out for coffee? Anyone else have the feeling that we’ll see Juliet utter that same sentence in Timeline B, maybe even in Sawyer’s flash sideways. That would be pretty excellent. Maybe that will trigger Sawyer to realize that his ‘other’ self is still in Timeline A, sort of like Juliet acting as his constant, and maybe his mind will start to bounce from one Timeline to the other. Would that not be awesome if the whole constant idea was re-introduced, since that was everyone’s favorite episode?
Meanwhile, Sayid is dying, Jack can’t save him, so ghost-Jacob shows up and informs Hugo how to save Sayid using an Egyptian artifact that Jacob stuffed into a guitar case. Brilliant. So when the temple folks capture the 815ers, it was part of Jacob’s plan, and thanks to Hurley’s quick thinking the crew is saved from the firing squad. What’s up with Lenin and Dogan? Should we care about them? Why is LOST introducing new characters so late in the game? Both of those dudes bug me for some reason.
Why is the pool dirty? Because Jacob is dead, and Flocke is in charge now, that’s why. Which is why the whole ‘drown Sayid’ routine doesn’t work out how they hoped it would. Dogan doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing, does he? He’s always one step behind. He can’t even manipulate Jack to do what he wants. That was elementary for the Others’ other leader, Ben Linus.
So somehow Sawyer escapes, and Kate (of course) chases after him, hoping to win his heart so that she can crush it again. Jin comes along too (probably to look for Sun) and then who shows up … Jungle Claire! According to Dogan, she is possessed by a darkness, the same darkness that took Sayid. Or rather, the word used is ‘claimed.’
Is Claire the new Rousseau? She looks just like her, but was Rousseau claimed, or just crazy? It seemed she was the only Frenchie who wasn’t claimed. Will Claire remember the Losties, or Aaron, or anything? Not sure. Will she still be a terrible actress? For sure.
So the Kwon reunion is postponed for a while, now that Sun is headed to the temple, and Jin is headed away from the temple. Blast! But before Jin can go anywhere he must deal with crazy Claire.
Back in the temple, Sayid died but then came back to live. His first words: “What happened?” A brilliant reference to the episode title “Whatever happened, happened.” Or a clue, because when Richard took Ben into the temple and healed him, Ben’s first words after waking up were “what happened?” Does Sayid know that he is claimed? Or has the darkness not yet reached his heart? Is there any way to stop it without killing him? And apparently he has to be killed voluntarily, much like the way Jacob had to be killed by one of his own people, someone who was baptized into the pool of Jacob-ness. Now Sayid has been baptized into the dirty pool of the Monster, so does he have to be killed by one of the Monster’s people?
Or does this mean that if the Losties can keep Sayid from being “claimed’ by the darkness, that he can be the weapon used to kill the Nemesis, since he is now one of the nemesis’s followers. That’s a theory that makes sense to me. Sort of like the loophole killing. Plus Sayid does have it in his nature to kill, and wouldn’t it be redeeming if the torturer ended up being the one who ultimately killed the bad guy and saved the day?
In the rest of the temple action, we’ve seen Cindy and the kids after a four season absence, and Hurley and Miles continue to provide perfect comic relief at just the right moments. Jack has relapsed into his annoying, demanding, cocky season two self, and I don’t know if that’s because the bomb didn’t work and he no longer believes in destiny, or if Matthew Fox is just an awful actor and doesn’t know how to act any other way. It’s a shame that the two central characters of LOST, Jack and Kate, are played by the only two actors on the show who display no character depth. Especially when they are pitted next to constantly brilliant performances by Locke, Sawyer, Ben, and even Hurley and Sayid on occasion.
The Temple Others are panicking and scattering ash around like crazy, preparing for the impending war against Smokie. They know it’s coming, because they know Jacob’s dead. But something tells me Jacob has an ace up his sleeve, and it might have something to do with Timeline B. Or his ace might be Ilana, his mysterious follower who was smart enough to let Bram and the boys get killed by Flocke while she stayed outside. She definitely knows something that she’s not telling the rest of the gang. Like, how did she know to be on Ajira 316 in the first place? And how did she know that Nemesis would take over Locke’s body? In my opinion she’s definitely been to the island before. If she didn’t have that annoyed lisp, I’d say she’s the most interesting new character in a while.
So that about sums up the action so far.
I’d like to ask a few questions, starting with this one: who the heck was the little boy that Flocke saw in the jungle? Why were his arms bloody, and who was he referring to when he said “You know the rules. You can’t kill him.” Was that not one of the creepiest and coolest scenes in LOST history, when Flocke chased him through the jungle, and seemed genuinely freaked out by both his appearance and his words of warning?
I think the boy was a young Jacob, and I think he was referring to not killing Sawyer, but it could just have easily been Richard, I'm really not sure which. I think Jacob and Esau are like the captains of a team, and they pick teams by touching people, or manipulating people, or maybe some join the team voluntarily. When the final war begins they (Jacob and Esau) aren’t allowed to fight, like captains who aren’t allowed to play. Since Flocke recognized the boy Jacob, I think it stands to reason that Esau and Jacob knew each other as kids, or at least Jacob was a kid and Esau was an adult. The bloody arms make me think that the kid was murdered, presumably on the island, by the Nemesis. But if the kid is a young Jacob, does that mean Jacob was dead all along? I guess that could be why he never ages. Or maybe the arms were bloody to symbolize that Jacob is now dead, after being stabbed by Ben. Maybe the fact that there’s a kid Jacob implies that there’s a kid Monster, thus furthering my theory that Smokie is Aaron.
What about the rules? Who made the rules? Did Jacob and Esau make them together? Or is there a higher power, maybe the Island itself? What are the rules? Who knows about them? Ben and Widmore talked about rules, but do either of them really know what’s going on?
I think the rules are designed to give people free will, and to keep the fight fair. Or possibly, to make the fight more interesting. Similar to the rules of chess, and all the people on the island are pieces. And like we saw on the cave wall, certain pieces get captured, and some stay in the game. In fact, the word used in chess for taking an opponent’s piece is “claimed.”
What about the fact that the when the boy appeared, he was shining with a sort of golden glow? Usually when an apparition appears in the jungle, it’s the smoke monster? But it obviously wasn’t, since Flocke was standing right there.
Or maybe it was a different kind of smoke monster. A WHITE smoke monster? Have there been two smoke monsters all along, claiming pieces and getting to know the players so they can recruit them for the war? Remember when Locke saw the Monster is season one, only it was from the monster’s perspective and we didn’t see what Locke actually saw, and then later he told Jack “I have looked into the eye of the island, and what I saw was beautiful.”
Could that have been the white smoke monster?
I’m torn on this theory, and won’t be shocked either way. I’d love it if there were two smoke monsters, but it’s not vital to the story if there are.
Ilana says that the Nemesis is now stuck in the form of Locke, and won’t be able to turn into anyone else. Why is that? Is part of the rules? It must be because Jacob is dead, and one of them has to have a permanent body at all times, or something to that affect? What is the significance of the temple? What is in there that Flocke wants so badly? Is it the healing pool of water? A way off the island? Or a way to possess final and absolute dominance of the island?
Based on the original 1850s conversation between Jacob and the Enemy, we know that they disagree profoundly on human beings and having them on the island. Smokie doesn’t seem to think too highly of mankind, which makes me nervous for Sawyer. Jacob seems to trust people and continues to bring them to the island, even though they continually fail. Maybe he doesn’t just want them around for random decoration, but maybe he’s been searching for his replacement, for the Candidate, for centuries and that’s why he keeps bringing more and more people to the island. Maybe all the people he touched in the real world (Jack, Kate, Sawyer, etc) are now Candidates.
Doesn’t it just seem inevitable that Jack will become the new Jacob? Oh man …
-LA X Part 1
-LA X Part 2
-What Kate Does
-The Substitute
In every season of LOST thus far, the main concept of the season has been revealed in the first moments of the first episode. Season one: plane crash. Season two: the hatch. Season three: the others. Season four: rescue. And season five: time travel.
So what is it for season six? So far I would say it can be summed up as: alternative timelines. To which my response was at the time, and still is: What the heck? Really? All the drama of season five and the explosion and Faraday’s research and the result of everything is … alternative timelines, which no one is even aware of except us the audience. For real?
I’m trying to fight off the disappointment and trust the writers that this is going somewhere, but I have to admit I’m not thrilled through the first four episodes. Granted, there’s a lot of LOST remaining and I like the direction we’re headed in with Smoke-Locke and Jacob and the immanent war. But still, Timeline B has about two more episodes to start making some sense before I start punching innocent puppies.
To summarize the events in Timeline B, we begin on the flight of Oceanic 815 where most things are the same, but there are a few subtle differences: Shannon is gone, Hurley claims to be lucky, and Charlie appears to be suicidal. Whatever. The keys in my mind are these: Desmond appears on the plane (possibly only seen by Jack), Christian Shepherd’s body is not on the plane, and Jack seems to be experiencing some sort of déjà vu and has a weird cut on his neck, similar to the bloody spot on Desmond’s neck from when he was time traveling around in The Constant.
We saw Kate miraculously escape from an armed US Marshall using only a pen and her wits, then hijack a cab, befriend it’s frightened occupant, and then escort said occupant to the hospital and help her give birth to a healthy baby boy. I can’t decide what’s less realistic: a time-traveling, monster-infested island in the Pacific, or Kate Austin’s character. Kate tells Claire she’s innocent. Is she? I don’t know, and I don’t care. I just hope we don’t see any more Kate-centric episodes this season.
Elsewhere in Timeline B, John Locke is still paralyzed, still pathetic, but on a happier note, he’s engaged to Helen Norwood and seemingly on good terms with his father – which begs the question, how did he get paralyzed this time? I also wonder, what led him to Australia to go on a Walkabout, since Matthew Abaddon, who works for Widmore, wouldn’t have been there to nudge him in the Walkabout direction, since we can only assume that Widmore is dead. Since landing in LA, Locke has randomly encountered Jack, then Hurley, then Rose, and then Ben Linus, and he won’t let any of them tell him what he can’t do.
Where is Timeline B going? I assume we’ll see episodes centric on Sayid (who will be happy with Nadia), Sun and Jin (miserable as ever) and Sawyer (conning his way through life), but each with little changes here and there. And of course the super-doctor Jack episode, where we’ll find out why Christian’s body wasn’t on the plane and hope it has some relevance to the island and to Jacob. There may be a Hurley episode (although I’m not sure I can handle seeing his mother again) or a Claire episode or even a Ben episode. Frankly, I don’t care about Timeline B until a connection with Timeline A is established.
And with that, let’s move on to the events of Timeline A, beginning at the foot statue with Jacob’s Enemy, also called Flocke (for Fake Locke), Nemesis, Smokie, Dr. Loophole, Esau, or simply The Monster. Early in the first episode, it was revealed beyond any and all possible doubt that Locke and the Monster and Jacob’s Enemy are all one and the same. Not sure if he is possessing him, or using him, or inhabiting him, or simply the Monster has become him. Whatever word you want to use, doesn’t really matter, the bottom line is Locke=Smoke Monster.
Now there’s a slim, 1% chance that the Monster is actually the good guy and Jacob is actually bad, and that would be a cool twist. But I don’t think that’s the case.
Flocke turns into Smokie, destroys ‘Jacob’s bodyguards,’ including Bram, and is impenetrable to bullets. He then delivers the best line of season six: “Sorry you had to see me like that.” Boom!
Ben is freaking out, Richard is freaking out, and Frank Lapidus stands off to the side and makes sarcastic remarks like “Another day in paradise…” or “Guess we’re in for the ride of our lives.” I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty ready for Frank to meet his end. He’s not a terrible character, but what good is a comic-relief guy if he’s not funny? Nemesis then punches Ricardus in the throat, tells the crowd that he is disappointed in them (weird), and insinuates that Richard was originally a slave on the Black Rock, which I’m sure we’ll see in about 7 or 8 episodes. He then carries him off into the jungle, ties him up, and goes “recruiting.” He picks up Sawyer, chases after a 12 year old blond kid (either young Jacob or old Aaron - or both?) and successfully ‘recruits’ Sawyer through some classic LOST-style manipulation.
How freaking awesome was the cave? Beginning with Jacob’s ladder (Genesis reference anyone?) and the white-black scale (reference to Locke’s famous words from all the way back to early season one), and the names on the wall and the numbers. That scene has to be among the greatest of all “Holy Crap!” moments in LOST history. The numbers! They actually mean something! Not sure what … but apparently they correspond to the characters who have stayed alive, and are “candidates.” Are Jin and Sun linked as one ‘Kwon’ – is that why Jacob told them to always value their love and stay together – or does the fact that there’s only one ‘Kwon’ on the wall mean one of them is about to die. Why wasn’t Kate’s name on the wall? Did we just not see it, or is there something to that? Maybe she’s never been a candidate because Jacob knows that she’s a stupid idiot and a terrible actress.
Maybe the reason Kate and Sun aren't Candidates is because they didn't do what Jacob told them to. Remember he told Kate not to steal again, and he told Sun (the cheating whore) not to ever take her love for granted. Maybe that's why their names weren't on the wall?
Now that Sawyer has agreed to “get off this damn island,” what next? They surely aren’t just going to waltz onto a cargo ship. The ticket off the island is through the temple – at least that’s my thought. The immanent war between Jacob and Smokie is going to be over the temple, and fought at the temple. I believe Flocke’s recruitment is for the war, and that would pit Sawyer against his fellow 815ers. And I don’t rule out the possibility of him actually fighting against them, since they are responsible for Juliet’s death. Wouldn’t it be awesome if Sawyer kills Kate!? Oh my gosh!
So that about sums up the Flocke storyline thus far. Which leaves the temple folks, the most important but also most confusing part of season six. Let’s start with this question: how did the blast send 8 individuals to 2007 – but also send them into an alternative timeline? I understand them being sent to their actual present time, but if a second reality was created, how does that factor in? I think season six desperately needs a cameo appearance by Daniel Faraday so he can explain all this to us.
So why was Kate halfway up a tree? That was ridiculous. She shimmies down, Sawyer kicks Jack in the face, Juliet dies right in front of Sawyer’s eyes (for the second time in ten minutes!) and “it worked.”
How did Juliet know it worked? Did her consciousness flash to Timeline B? Is that why she said some weird thing about going out for coffee? Anyone else have the feeling that we’ll see Juliet utter that same sentence in Timeline B, maybe even in Sawyer’s flash sideways. That would be pretty excellent. Maybe that will trigger Sawyer to realize that his ‘other’ self is still in Timeline A, sort of like Juliet acting as his constant, and maybe his mind will start to bounce from one Timeline to the other. Would that not be awesome if the whole constant idea was re-introduced, since that was everyone’s favorite episode?
Meanwhile, Sayid is dying, Jack can’t save him, so ghost-Jacob shows up and informs Hugo how to save Sayid using an Egyptian artifact that Jacob stuffed into a guitar case. Brilliant. So when the temple folks capture the 815ers, it was part of Jacob’s plan, and thanks to Hurley’s quick thinking the crew is saved from the firing squad. What’s up with Lenin and Dogan? Should we care about them? Why is LOST introducing new characters so late in the game? Both of those dudes bug me for some reason.
Why is the pool dirty? Because Jacob is dead, and Flocke is in charge now, that’s why. Which is why the whole ‘drown Sayid’ routine doesn’t work out how they hoped it would. Dogan doesn’t seem to know what he’s doing, does he? He’s always one step behind. He can’t even manipulate Jack to do what he wants. That was elementary for the Others’ other leader, Ben Linus.
So somehow Sawyer escapes, and Kate (of course) chases after him, hoping to win his heart so that she can crush it again. Jin comes along too (probably to look for Sun) and then who shows up … Jungle Claire! According to Dogan, she is possessed by a darkness, the same darkness that took Sayid. Or rather, the word used is ‘claimed.’
Is Claire the new Rousseau? She looks just like her, but was Rousseau claimed, or just crazy? It seemed she was the only Frenchie who wasn’t claimed. Will Claire remember the Losties, or Aaron, or anything? Not sure. Will she still be a terrible actress? For sure.
So the Kwon reunion is postponed for a while, now that Sun is headed to the temple, and Jin is headed away from the temple. Blast! But before Jin can go anywhere he must deal with crazy Claire.
Back in the temple, Sayid died but then came back to live. His first words: “What happened?” A brilliant reference to the episode title “Whatever happened, happened.” Or a clue, because when Richard took Ben into the temple and healed him, Ben’s first words after waking up were “what happened?” Does Sayid know that he is claimed? Or has the darkness not yet reached his heart? Is there any way to stop it without killing him? And apparently he has to be killed voluntarily, much like the way Jacob had to be killed by one of his own people, someone who was baptized into the pool of Jacob-ness. Now Sayid has been baptized into the dirty pool of the Monster, so does he have to be killed by one of the Monster’s people?
Or does this mean that if the Losties can keep Sayid from being “claimed’ by the darkness, that he can be the weapon used to kill the Nemesis, since he is now one of the nemesis’s followers. That’s a theory that makes sense to me. Sort of like the loophole killing. Plus Sayid does have it in his nature to kill, and wouldn’t it be redeeming if the torturer ended up being the one who ultimately killed the bad guy and saved the day?
In the rest of the temple action, we’ve seen Cindy and the kids after a four season absence, and Hurley and Miles continue to provide perfect comic relief at just the right moments. Jack has relapsed into his annoying, demanding, cocky season two self, and I don’t know if that’s because the bomb didn’t work and he no longer believes in destiny, or if Matthew Fox is just an awful actor and doesn’t know how to act any other way. It’s a shame that the two central characters of LOST, Jack and Kate, are played by the only two actors on the show who display no character depth. Especially when they are pitted next to constantly brilliant performances by Locke, Sawyer, Ben, and even Hurley and Sayid on occasion.
The Temple Others are panicking and scattering ash around like crazy, preparing for the impending war against Smokie. They know it’s coming, because they know Jacob’s dead. But something tells me Jacob has an ace up his sleeve, and it might have something to do with Timeline B. Or his ace might be Ilana, his mysterious follower who was smart enough to let Bram and the boys get killed by Flocke while she stayed outside. She definitely knows something that she’s not telling the rest of the gang. Like, how did she know to be on Ajira 316 in the first place? And how did she know that Nemesis would take over Locke’s body? In my opinion she’s definitely been to the island before. If she didn’t have that annoyed lisp, I’d say she’s the most interesting new character in a while.
So that about sums up the action so far.
I’d like to ask a few questions, starting with this one: who the heck was the little boy that Flocke saw in the jungle? Why were his arms bloody, and who was he referring to when he said “You know the rules. You can’t kill him.” Was that not one of the creepiest and coolest scenes in LOST history, when Flocke chased him through the jungle, and seemed genuinely freaked out by both his appearance and his words of warning?
I think the boy was a young Jacob, and I think he was referring to not killing Sawyer, but it could just have easily been Richard, I'm really not sure which. I think Jacob and Esau are like the captains of a team, and they pick teams by touching people, or manipulating people, or maybe some join the team voluntarily. When the final war begins they (Jacob and Esau) aren’t allowed to fight, like captains who aren’t allowed to play. Since Flocke recognized the boy Jacob, I think it stands to reason that Esau and Jacob knew each other as kids, or at least Jacob was a kid and Esau was an adult. The bloody arms make me think that the kid was murdered, presumably on the island, by the Nemesis. But if the kid is a young Jacob, does that mean Jacob was dead all along? I guess that could be why he never ages. Or maybe the arms were bloody to symbolize that Jacob is now dead, after being stabbed by Ben. Maybe the fact that there’s a kid Jacob implies that there’s a kid Monster, thus furthering my theory that Smokie is Aaron.
What about the rules? Who made the rules? Did Jacob and Esau make them together? Or is there a higher power, maybe the Island itself? What are the rules? Who knows about them? Ben and Widmore talked about rules, but do either of them really know what’s going on?
I think the rules are designed to give people free will, and to keep the fight fair. Or possibly, to make the fight more interesting. Similar to the rules of chess, and all the people on the island are pieces. And like we saw on the cave wall, certain pieces get captured, and some stay in the game. In fact, the word used in chess for taking an opponent’s piece is “claimed.”
What about the fact that the when the boy appeared, he was shining with a sort of golden glow? Usually when an apparition appears in the jungle, it’s the smoke monster? But it obviously wasn’t, since Flocke was standing right there.
Or maybe it was a different kind of smoke monster. A WHITE smoke monster? Have there been two smoke monsters all along, claiming pieces and getting to know the players so they can recruit them for the war? Remember when Locke saw the Monster is season one, only it was from the monster’s perspective and we didn’t see what Locke actually saw, and then later he told Jack “I have looked into the eye of the island, and what I saw was beautiful.”
Could that have been the white smoke monster?
I’m torn on this theory, and won’t be shocked either way. I’d love it if there were two smoke monsters, but it’s not vital to the story if there are.
Ilana says that the Nemesis is now stuck in the form of Locke, and won’t be able to turn into anyone else. Why is that? Is part of the rules? It must be because Jacob is dead, and one of them has to have a permanent body at all times, or something to that affect? What is the significance of the temple? What is in there that Flocke wants so badly? Is it the healing pool of water? A way off the island? Or a way to possess final and absolute dominance of the island?
Based on the original 1850s conversation between Jacob and the Enemy, we know that they disagree profoundly on human beings and having them on the island. Smokie doesn’t seem to think too highly of mankind, which makes me nervous for Sawyer. Jacob seems to trust people and continues to bring them to the island, even though they continually fail. Maybe he doesn’t just want them around for random decoration, but maybe he’s been searching for his replacement, for the Candidate, for centuries and that’s why he keeps bringing more and more people to the island. Maybe all the people he touched in the real world (Jack, Kate, Sawyer, etc) are now Candidates.
Doesn’t it just seem inevitable that Jack will become the new Jacob? Oh man …
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
16 days
hey guys
now that football season is over it has been 16 days since my last post. i feel bad. i'd like to write some stuff about the pistons but they're so pathetic i don't even want to think about them.
the nba trade deadline is this thursday. was hoping to see Bosh or Ray Allen get traded but it doesnt look likely. Caron Butler went to Dallas and Marcus Camby is now on Portland, and both of those trades may end up being more meaningful than people realize when the West playoffs roll around. especially Camby giving portland the center and rebounder they needed so badly. that could be huge in the playofs against bigs like gasol, duncan and dirk.
this trade also opens the door for blake griffin ato start next season for the clips and gives them a pass-first point guard in steve blake off the bench, something they need. as for washington, they traded one slacker (butler) for another (josh howard) and lost a viable center (haywood) in the process. they should be better off financially but they still have giblert arenas' ludacris contract dangling over their heads like the sword of damacles and dopey flip saunders calling the plays, so don't look for them to be a playoff contender for another 4-5 years.
rumors are swirling that amare stoudemire is leaving phoenix in the next two days, and it sounds like its either cleveland or miami. i'll believe it when i see it. the dude is athletic and scary-looking, but ultimately kind of harmless in the paint . i dont think he makes either team much better to be honest, nor does he keep lebron in cleveland or keep d-wade from taking the highest $$ offer.
ummm... what else? the all star game was decent. the dunk contest was wretched.
oh, it sounds like corey maggette might be going to the cavs if they cant get amare. that would be pretty big if you ask me. partly because the cavs need another scorer, and partly because the addition of maggette would severely cripple lebron's chances of keeping up 30 ppg and thus not winning the scoring title and allowing durant (or maybe carmelo) to take the title.
which would be great for two reasons:
1 - i love Durant and would love to see him win the scoring title, and
2- that would mean lebron has only 1 scoring title after 7 seasons in the league
(by comparision, michael jordan had 7 scoring titles in his first 8 seasons, and the one year he didnt win it (his rookie year) he scored the most points in the nba but didnt have the highest average. by contrast, the one time lebron did win a scoring title he did NOT score the most points in the league. of the 10 times MJ won a scoring title, he always scored the most points as well. all that to say, stop comparing lebron to MJ people.)
nothing else to say except that LOST is on tonight and its going to be a good one.
last week sucked because it was a Kate episode. this week is a John Locke, called "The Substitute." we've seen episodes called 'the constant' and 'the variable' already and they've both been focused on time travel and the question of linear timelines. will this week be when we see why there are suddenly two timelines and how they're connected? will locke in timeline A be healed from paralysis? will locke in timeline B come back to life? is sayid now the black smoke monster? is claire? where is locke taking richard? will sun and jin finally reunite this week? what about desmond? and aaron? and is jacob really dead?
a lot of questions. hopefully we'll see some answers this week.
now that football season is over it has been 16 days since my last post. i feel bad. i'd like to write some stuff about the pistons but they're so pathetic i don't even want to think about them.
the nba trade deadline is this thursday. was hoping to see Bosh or Ray Allen get traded but it doesnt look likely. Caron Butler went to Dallas and Marcus Camby is now on Portland, and both of those trades may end up being more meaningful than people realize when the West playoffs roll around. especially Camby giving portland the center and rebounder they needed so badly. that could be huge in the playofs against bigs like gasol, duncan and dirk.
this trade also opens the door for blake griffin ato start next season for the clips and gives them a pass-first point guard in steve blake off the bench, something they need. as for washington, they traded one slacker (butler) for another (josh howard) and lost a viable center (haywood) in the process. they should be better off financially but they still have giblert arenas' ludacris contract dangling over their heads like the sword of damacles and dopey flip saunders calling the plays, so don't look for them to be a playoff contender for another 4-5 years.
rumors are swirling that amare stoudemire is leaving phoenix in the next two days, and it sounds like its either cleveland or miami. i'll believe it when i see it. the dude is athletic and scary-looking, but ultimately kind of harmless in the paint . i dont think he makes either team much better to be honest, nor does he keep lebron in cleveland or keep d-wade from taking the highest $$ offer.
ummm... what else? the all star game was decent. the dunk contest was wretched.
oh, it sounds like corey maggette might be going to the cavs if they cant get amare. that would be pretty big if you ask me. partly because the cavs need another scorer, and partly because the addition of maggette would severely cripple lebron's chances of keeping up 30 ppg and thus not winning the scoring title and allowing durant (or maybe carmelo) to take the title.
which would be great for two reasons:
1 - i love Durant and would love to see him win the scoring title, and
2- that would mean lebron has only 1 scoring title after 7 seasons in the league
(by comparision, michael jordan had 7 scoring titles in his first 8 seasons, and the one year he didnt win it (his rookie year) he scored the most points in the nba but didnt have the highest average. by contrast, the one time lebron did win a scoring title he did NOT score the most points in the league. of the 10 times MJ won a scoring title, he always scored the most points as well. all that to say, stop comparing lebron to MJ people.)
nothing else to say except that LOST is on tonight and its going to be a good one.
last week sucked because it was a Kate episode. this week is a John Locke, called "The Substitute." we've seen episodes called 'the constant' and 'the variable' already and they've both been focused on time travel and the question of linear timelines. will this week be when we see why there are suddenly two timelines and how they're connected? will locke in timeline A be healed from paralysis? will locke in timeline B come back to life? is sayid now the black smoke monster? is claire? where is locke taking richard? will sun and jin finally reunite this week? what about desmond? and aaron? and is jacob really dead?
a lot of questions. hopefully we'll see some answers this week.
Monday, February 1, 2010
SB Pick
Super Bowl Pick
After a 67% regular season, I am now 5-5 in the postseason, after picking the first 4 games wrong. The Super Bowl will decide whether I am above .500 or below .500. It all comes down to the Colts and Saints, who have been on a collision course for Miami ever since week 1. Will it be the Team of Destiny, or the Team of Dominance? The hurricane-hit city of hope, or the fair-weather-fans of Indy who booed their own team for going 13-1? The best quarterback in the NFL, or the second best quarterback in the NFL? (Note: I’m not sure which is which.)
America will be rooting for the Saints; residents of Indiana will be rooting for the Colts.
I still haven’t decided who I’ll be rooting for.
I love the ‘Destiny’ angle and Drew Brees is one of the classiest, nicest players dating back to his Purdue days. But the Saints have Shockey. And Reggie Bush. And Harry Connick Jr. And I don’t want to see any of those clowns celebrating.
I like the Colts too, but when I went to the Colts-Pats game in November and saw half the stadium leave when the Pats took the lead by 13 with 4 minutes left, I lost any respect I had for the Indy faithful. I seemed to be the only one in Lucas Oil Stadium who knew Peyton Manning would come back and win the game, and I was the only one who wasn’t cheering for the Colts. Between that and the week 16 booing, I’d say Colts fans are the least deserving fan-base in the NFL, other than Pittsburgh of course.
So I’m rooting for New Orleans’ fans.
But I like Peyton, and Wayne and Clark and all those guys, and the Colts are such a classy, no-nonsense team who plays the right way. I also like the fact that if Manning wins it, he really cements himself as one of the all-time greats without question, and I’d be okay with that. I like Bill Polian, and Jim Caldwell, and especially Tony Dungy. So I’d be okay with the Colts winning. The only problems I have with that are a) watching Eli celebrate the win, and b) Colts fans who don’t deserve it.
So overall, I’ll be rooting for New Orleans, but understanding that in a historic perspective it’s better if the Colts win, and I will not lose any sleep either way. Unless I’m rooting for the Lions or against the Steelers, I really am not invested in who wins or loses any game.
As far as my prediction, right now I’m leaning towards the Saints, and here’s why:
(yes, Andy I realize you wrote basically this same thing but I thought about it a few days ago and then saw you write it yesterday so stop copying everything I say!)
The last two games, the Saints D has played against Kurt Warner (who just had arguably the best season of his career) and Brett Favre (ditto). Their defense has been torched, but it’s also been primed to face the best QB in the NFL who isn’t on the Saints. Gregg Williams will continue to apply pressure on Manning, a strategy that both the Jets and Ravens tried to no avail. But the alternative is to rush 4 and force Manning to make tough throws, and if you do that, Manning will destroy you. It’s a lose-lose situation, but at least pressure packages give the Saints D the chance to make a big play or two.
The Colts defense, on the other hand, has played back to back games against Joe Flacco (who absolutely fell apart as the season progressed) and Mark Sanchez (a rookie with some hideous facial hair). Are they ready for Drew Brees? No. Not even close.
The Colts D will continue to rush Freeney and Mathis and rely on the overall speed in the middle of the field to stymie the passing attack. They’ve faced two straight rushing offenses and fared pretty well, but their primary weakness is against the pass, and Brees should be able to roll over them with ease.
We all know this is going to be a high-scoring, offense-dominated Super Bowl, and it’s probably going to come down to the fourth quarter. But my gut tells me that the team who gets off to a faster start will be in control, and will have the luxury of running the ball and staying flexible on offense. (Even though in both Championship games, the team that got off to the faster start ended up losing). But I think the Saints will be that team. I think Brees leads them to at least 2 TD drives in the first quarter. I think Indy has to play catch-up, and Brees makes it difficult by continuing to score every chance he gets. I think we’re in store for an epic QB dual, a back and forth scoring affair that makes both defenses look pedestrian, and I think at the end of the day, everyone will be saying, “Well what do you know, Drew Brees is the best quarterback in the NFL right now.”
The highest scoring Super Bowl ever was 49-26, a combined 75 points, when San Fran beat San Diego in 1995. I’d say the odds of this game breaking that record are at least 1:3. Each team needs to score 5 TDs and someone has to score one more. No sweat.
I think we’re looking at 35-45, Saints.
But then again …
The Colts are 15-0 in the last 15 games that they’ve actually tried to win. Dating back to last year, they are 25-1 in their last 26 games in which they actually tried, and the one loss was an overtime game against San Diego in which the Colts never got the ball in OT due to the worst rule in all of sports (the coin flip). It’s tough to bet against those odds. It’s tough to bet against the most clutch player in football, Peyton Manning. (Never thought I’d say that …) It's tough ...
But the Saints are the Team of Destinae.
(yes I realize it's spelled wrong but it looks better like that)
(yes I realize it's spelled wrong but it looks better like that)
Saints by 10.
Brees - MVP.
And Manning makes this face:
Enjoy the Super Bowl (and commericals).
Go Lions.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Top 50 Players in the NBA - finally finished!!
Top 50 Players in the NBA
2010 Edition
Here’s how it works:
If all the players in the NBA were re-shuffled and Player X was placed on a team with average players at every other position, how positively would Player X impact that team’s chances of winning a championship?
The rankings are not based on current contracts or how many years Player X has left in the tank, but are based on the 2009-2010 season only.
*sorry if the pictures and captions are a little off. I couldn't get the site to format them right ...
And here are the rankings …
50. Andre Miller
There were a ton of guys I considered for the #50 spot (among them: Turkoglu, Noah, B. Davis, Ariza, S. Jackson, Nene, Biedrins, Love, B. Lopez, Perkins, Calderon, and a million others) but ultimately I went with Andre Miller because of his all-around game, his superb passing ability, and his overall leadership quality on Portland, one of the best teams in the West.
49. Lamar Odom
One of the most well-rounded players in the NBA and a perfect fit for the triangle-offense, Odom excels in his limited role in LA. He also is married to a Khardashian.
48. Marcus Camby
Well on his way to his 7th straight season with 10 boards and 2 blocks, and anchoring a surprisingly good Clippers’ defense. He also has the best assist-to-turnover ratio of any big man in the NBA.
47. David West
Chris Paul’s underappreciated sidekick scores 17 and pulls down about 7 boards a game, which is good; but he had 21 and 8 last year and his decline in production is part of the reason for the Hornets’ lackluster start.
46. Chris Kaman
The Central Michigan alum is one of the ugliest, weirdest looking dudes in the NBA, but he can rebound pretty well and is scoring over 20 ppg. He’s actually the highest scoring “center” in the NBA right now (Dirk, Bosh and Stoudemire are considered PFs). Between Kaman and Camby, the Clippers have a scary good frontcourt. And they still have #1 overall pick Blake Griffin sitting on the bench, which means something’s gotta give.
He may not be much to look at, but Kaman is an effective low-post player.
45. Russell Westbrook
Oklahoma City’s diminutive point guard is one of my favorite little-known players in the NBA. In just his second season, he’s averaging 16 points and 7.5 assists, as well as being one of the best rebounding guards in the NBA – second in boards to only Jason Kidd. He’s also top five in blocks among point guards, and is a major reason for OKC’s wildly successful season.
44. Vince carter
I’ve never liked Vince Carter. He was a douche when he was with the Raptors, and a douche on the Nets, so I assume he’s probably still a douche on the Magic. He’s always been a ‘high-volume-of-shots, low-shooting-percentage’ kind of scorer, (a la Iverson or T-Mac), and in my opinion those are the dumbest type of players in the NBA, if you actually want to win games, and not just sell tickets. It’s like having a running back in the NFL who gets to carry the ball 40 times a game but doesn’t average more than 3 ypc. It doesn’t make sense. But now that he’s on Orlando, where ironically he has career lows in both PPG and FG%, Vince has been forced to take a backseat to Dwight, Rashard and the rest of the gang, and is averaging less FG attempts per game than ever before in his career. Which is a good thing.
43. Devin Harris
It’s hard to rank a Nets player this high considering their woeful 3-39 record, but I’m still a believer in Harris’s game and haven’t backed off my thoughts that he’s one of the more underrated players in the NBA. It’s been a tough year for him, and he doesn’t have many excuses for not being able to win. He plays alongside a good scorer (Douglas-Roberts) and a good big man (Lopez) in an offense that was supposed to be explosive. But they’ve been absolutely horrid, and his numbers (15 ppg and 38% from the floor, compared to 21 ppg and 43% last year) have not looked very impressive. Bottom line though: would I rather build have Harris at point guard, or a guy like Rodney Stuckey or Jameer Nelson? The answer would still be Harris.
42. Andrew Bynum
Rumors are swirling that a Bynum-for-Bosh trade may be in the works, which could be detrimental to Bynum’s development, and also to anyone other than the Lakers having a chance at the 2010 title. But for now, Bynum is a sometimes-dominant, sometimes-lousy big man who benefits from playing next to Kobe and Gasol. But, he does have one of my favorite NBA highlights of all time. Check it out.
41. Corey Maggette
Maggette’s a very easy player to forget about. I keep having to reminding myself that he’s on the Warriors, not the Clippers. But scoring 20 ppg at a 54% clip is solid no matter where you play, and he ranks in the top ten in points scored per 48 minutes. Which is another way of saying: he’s efficient. In fact, there is a little-used statistic called ‘PPS’ which stands for Points Per Shot, which measures a players’ field goal percentage against field goals attempted, factoring in 3-pointers, and guess who ranks #2, behind only Dwight Howard? Yup, Corey Maggette. There’s only one other non-center in the top five, and I wasn’t surprised to see that it was indeed Chauncey Billups.
40. Andrew Bogut
The #1 overall pick in 2005 was considered a bit of a bust for a while, and is still underperforming considering his contract (just signed to a 5-year, $60 million extension). But the 7-foot Australian is finally showing signs of why he was drafted ahead of Chris Paul, Danny Granger, Deron Williams, …. wait … no, never mind. But, he is averaging 15.5 and 10 rebounds, and has become one of the best shot-blockers in the NBA.
"Still trying to figure out how I was picked #1 overall, to be honest..."
33. Rashard Lewis.
11. Brandon Roy
(giant chasm)
2010 Edition
Here’s how it works:
If all the players in the NBA were re-shuffled and Player X was placed on a team with average players at every other position, how positively would Player X impact that team’s chances of winning a championship?
The rankings are not based on current contracts or how many years Player X has left in the tank, but are based on the 2009-2010 season only.
*sorry if the pictures and captions are a little off. I couldn't get the site to format them right ...
And here are the rankings …
50. Andre Miller
There were a ton of guys I considered for the #50 spot (among them: Turkoglu, Noah, B. Davis, Ariza, S. Jackson, Nene, Biedrins, Love, B. Lopez, Perkins, Calderon, and a million others) but ultimately I went with Andre Miller because of his all-around game, his superb passing ability, and his overall leadership quality on Portland, one of the best teams in the West.
49. Lamar Odom
One of the most well-rounded players in the NBA and a perfect fit for the triangle-offense, Odom excels in his limited role in LA. He also is married to a Khardashian.
48. Marcus Camby
Well on his way to his 7th straight season with 10 boards and 2 blocks, and anchoring a surprisingly good Clippers’ defense. He also has the best assist-to-turnover ratio of any big man in the NBA.
47. David West
Chris Paul’s underappreciated sidekick scores 17 and pulls down about 7 boards a game, which is good; but he had 21 and 8 last year and his decline in production is part of the reason for the Hornets’ lackluster start.
46. Chris Kaman
The Central Michigan alum is one of the ugliest, weirdest looking dudes in the NBA, but he can rebound pretty well and is scoring over 20 ppg. He’s actually the highest scoring “center” in the NBA right now (Dirk, Bosh and Stoudemire are considered PFs). Between Kaman and Camby, the Clippers have a scary good frontcourt. And they still have #1 overall pick Blake Griffin sitting on the bench, which means something’s gotta give.
He may not be much to look at, but Kaman is an effective low-post player.
45. Russell Westbrook
Oklahoma City’s diminutive point guard is one of my favorite little-known players in the NBA. In just his second season, he’s averaging 16 points and 7.5 assists, as well as being one of the best rebounding guards in the NBA – second in boards to only Jason Kidd. He’s also top five in blocks among point guards, and is a major reason for OKC’s wildly successful season.
44. Vince carter
I’ve never liked Vince Carter. He was a douche when he was with the Raptors, and a douche on the Nets, so I assume he’s probably still a douche on the Magic. He’s always been a ‘high-volume-of-shots, low-shooting-percentage’ kind of scorer, (a la Iverson or T-Mac), and in my opinion those are the dumbest type of players in the NBA, if you actually want to win games, and not just sell tickets. It’s like having a running back in the NFL who gets to carry the ball 40 times a game but doesn’t average more than 3 ypc. It doesn’t make sense. But now that he’s on Orlando, where ironically he has career lows in both PPG and FG%, Vince has been forced to take a backseat to Dwight, Rashard and the rest of the gang, and is averaging less FG attempts per game than ever before in his career. Which is a good thing.
43. Devin Harris
It’s hard to rank a Nets player this high considering their woeful 3-39 record, but I’m still a believer in Harris’s game and haven’t backed off my thoughts that he’s one of the more underrated players in the NBA. It’s been a tough year for him, and he doesn’t have many excuses for not being able to win. He plays alongside a good scorer (Douglas-Roberts) and a good big man (Lopez) in an offense that was supposed to be explosive. But they’ve been absolutely horrid, and his numbers (15 ppg and 38% from the floor, compared to 21 ppg and 43% last year) have not looked very impressive. Bottom line though: would I rather build have Harris at point guard, or a guy like Rodney Stuckey or Jameer Nelson? The answer would still be Harris.
42. Andrew Bynum
Rumors are swirling that a Bynum-for-Bosh trade may be in the works, which could be detrimental to Bynum’s development, and also to anyone other than the Lakers having a chance at the 2010 title. But for now, Bynum is a sometimes-dominant, sometimes-lousy big man who benefits from playing next to Kobe and Gasol. But, he does have one of my favorite NBA highlights of all time. Check it out.
41. Corey Maggette
Maggette’s a very easy player to forget about. I keep having to reminding myself that he’s on the Warriors, not the Clippers. But scoring 20 ppg at a 54% clip is solid no matter where you play, and he ranks in the top ten in points scored per 48 minutes. Which is another way of saying: he’s efficient. In fact, there is a little-used statistic called ‘PPS’ which stands for Points Per Shot, which measures a players’ field goal percentage against field goals attempted, factoring in 3-pointers, and guess who ranks #2, behind only Dwight Howard? Yup, Corey Maggette. There’s only one other non-center in the top five, and I wasn’t surprised to see that it was indeed Chauncey Billups.
40. Andrew Bogut
The #1 overall pick in 2005 was considered a bit of a bust for a while, and is still underperforming considering his contract (just signed to a 5-year, $60 million extension). But the 7-foot Australian is finally showing signs of why he was drafted ahead of Chris Paul, Danny Granger, Deron Williams, …. wait … no, never mind. But, he is averaging 15.5 and 10 rebounds, and has become one of the best shot-blockers in the NBA.
"Still trying to figure out how I was picked #1 overall, to be honest..."
39. Antwan Jamison
It’s been a season of turmoil for Wizards fans; they were expected to contend for a high playoff seed, and instead raced out to a 3-9 record and haven’t won more than two games in a row all season. Then Gilbert Arenas did one of the single dumbest things that any professional athlete has ever done, and threw away approximately $100,000,000 in the process. Now the entire Wizards roster, except for Jamison, is going through the motions and competing with no energy or heart. Sort of like the Detroit Pistons have been doing for the past 3 years. Wait, who’s the Wizards’ coach again? Flip Saunders? Hmmm…..
38. Tyreke Evans
Among rookies, Tyreke is 2nd in assists, 4th in rebounds, 2nd in steals, 6th in blocks, and 1st in scoring with 21 ppg (and a solid 46% fg) Filling in for injured Kevin Martin, Tyreke also led the Kings to a 15-21 start with very little help from one of the worst supporting casts in the NBA (they won only 17 games all of last year). He's the hands-down favorite for ROY honors. Looks like picking Evans over Ricky Rubio with the 4th overall pick wasn’t such a bonehead move after all, huh? NBA.com currently has Evans ranked in the top 10 in the MVP voting; that’s a bit of a stretch in my mind, but make no mistake, he is a future star. If you don’t believe me – listen to this and prepare to be blown away. The only other rookies to ever average 20 points, 5 rebounds and 5 assists in an NBA season: Oscar Robertson, Michael Jordan, and LeBron James. That’s it.
37. Manu Ginobili
I contemplated kicking Manu out of the top 50 entirely, for the following reasons: he plays only 25 minutes a game; he has only started 8 games over the past two seasons; he scores only 12.7 per game, making him just the 4th highest scoring Spur; his shooting percentage is 40%, a career low; and I just don’t like him. But I think he’s a product of a weird system, and is still a top 50 NBA player if he were on any other team. For some reason, the Spurs like to bring their third best player off the bench and start Keith Bogans instead. I’ll never understand it. But Ginobili is a great shooting guard, and a proven winner in the clutch, and would start and score 20+ for 90% of other teams. And he did this earlier this year, possibly the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.
36. Carlos Boozer
A year ago, when Boozer was the primary guy Joe Dumars was targeting in the offseason, I wasn’t all that excited. Now, I would gladly trade our entire roster for C-Booze to be in Piston blue. The guy commands respect on both ends of the floor, and gives effort every single night. He runs the pick-and-roll with D-Will brilliantly and is a bona fide top 8 power forward in the NBA.
35. Zach Randolph
Who would have ever thought that Z-Bo, the self-proclaimed gangsta who has been arrested numerous times for assault and drugs and other stupid things, and has been linked to illegal dogfighting, would one day actually live up to his potential and be a top 50 player in the NBA? This isn’t the first time Z has averaged 20 and 10 in the NBA, but it is his best season by far. His percentages are up. His idiotic problems are way down. And he seems to have reinvented himself in Memphis. In fact, the Grizz have actually assembled a pretty solid core of players (Z-Bo along with Gay, Mayo and Marc Gasol) and might actually be competitive in the years to come. The former MSU Spartan is 5th in the NBA in rebounds/game and 15th in points/game.
34. Mo Williams
Otherwise known as “The Only Reason LeBron Might Stay In Cleveland,” Mo Williams has been an ideal sidekick for LeBron. Of the 50+ guys who have attempted at least 150 threes this season, Mo has the best 3pt% with 42.9%. (The lowest? A pretty close race between Baron Davis' 27.7% and D-Wade's 28.8%). But that’s neither here nor there. Mo also dishes 5 assists per game as a 1/2 guard hybrid and scores 17. He’s good. But not quite good enough to keep LBJ in Ohio.
It’s been a season of turmoil for Wizards fans; they were expected to contend for a high playoff seed, and instead raced out to a 3-9 record and haven’t won more than two games in a row all season. Then Gilbert Arenas did one of the single dumbest things that any professional athlete has ever done, and threw away approximately $100,000,000 in the process. Now the entire Wizards roster, except for Jamison, is going through the motions and competing with no energy or heart. Sort of like the Detroit Pistons have been doing for the past 3 years. Wait, who’s the Wizards’ coach again? Flip Saunders? Hmmm…..
38. Tyreke Evans
Among rookies, Tyreke is 2nd in assists, 4th in rebounds, 2nd in steals, 6th in blocks, and 1st in scoring with 21 ppg (and a solid 46% fg) Filling in for injured Kevin Martin, Tyreke also led the Kings to a 15-21 start with very little help from one of the worst supporting casts in the NBA (they won only 17 games all of last year). He's the hands-down favorite for ROY honors. Looks like picking Evans over Ricky Rubio with the 4th overall pick wasn’t such a bonehead move after all, huh? NBA.com currently has Evans ranked in the top 10 in the MVP voting; that’s a bit of a stretch in my mind, but make no mistake, he is a future star. If you don’t believe me – listen to this and prepare to be blown away. The only other rookies to ever average 20 points, 5 rebounds and 5 assists in an NBA season: Oscar Robertson, Michael Jordan, and LeBron James. That’s it.
37. Manu Ginobili
I contemplated kicking Manu out of the top 50 entirely, for the following reasons: he plays only 25 minutes a game; he has only started 8 games over the past two seasons; he scores only 12.7 per game, making him just the 4th highest scoring Spur; his shooting percentage is 40%, a career low; and I just don’t like him. But I think he’s a product of a weird system, and is still a top 50 NBA player if he were on any other team. For some reason, the Spurs like to bring their third best player off the bench and start Keith Bogans instead. I’ll never understand it. But Ginobili is a great shooting guard, and a proven winner in the clutch, and would start and score 20+ for 90% of other teams. And he did this earlier this year, possibly the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen.
36. Carlos Boozer
A year ago, when Boozer was the primary guy Joe Dumars was targeting in the offseason, I wasn’t all that excited. Now, I would gladly trade our entire roster for C-Booze to be in Piston blue. The guy commands respect on both ends of the floor, and gives effort every single night. He runs the pick-and-roll with D-Will brilliantly and is a bona fide top 8 power forward in the NBA.
35. Zach Randolph
Who would have ever thought that Z-Bo, the self-proclaimed gangsta who has been arrested numerous times for assault and drugs and other stupid things, and has been linked to illegal dogfighting, would one day actually live up to his potential and be a top 50 player in the NBA? This isn’t the first time Z has averaged 20 and 10 in the NBA, but it is his best season by far. His percentages are up. His idiotic problems are way down. And he seems to have reinvented himself in Memphis. In fact, the Grizz have actually assembled a pretty solid core of players (Z-Bo along with Gay, Mayo and Marc Gasol) and might actually be competitive in the years to come. The former MSU Spartan is 5th in the NBA in rebounds/game and 15th in points/game.
34. Mo Williams
Otherwise known as “The Only Reason LeBron Might Stay In Cleveland,” Mo Williams has been an ideal sidekick for LeBron. Of the 50+ guys who have attempted at least 150 threes this season, Mo has the best 3pt% with 42.9%. (The lowest? A pretty close race between Baron Davis' 27.7% and D-Wade's 28.8%). But that’s neither here nor there. Mo also dishes 5 assists per game as a 1/2 guard hybrid and scores 17. He’s good. But not quite good enough to keep LBJ in Ohio.
Next season, Mo is going to be the best player on the Cavs. Uh oh ...
33. Rashard Lewis.
The ten game steroid suspension was not helpful, but the Magic did okay without him. Then he came back and Orlando reeled off 10 wins in Shard’s first 11 games back on the court. Maybe the Magic are just a really good team. Or maybe Rashard is one of the most underrated all-around forwards in the league. I’m not sure which is true. But I do know that they haven’t lost a step this season replacing Turkoglu with Vince Carter, and Lewis is a big reason why. And I know that he made at least 2 three-pointers in 18 consecutive games and has already hit 80 this season, while shooting a solid 39% from downtown, (an average of one 3-ball every 13 minutes, which is the second best rate in the NBA – behind only Danny Granger). I know Rashard is the major benefactor of playing alongside the NBA’s best big man, and he scores only 15 a game, but I’m keeping him on the list primarily because he’s the second best player on a team which is 28-15 and went to the NBA Finals last year.
32. Andre Iguodala
The poster boy for “Best Player on a Crappy Team.” He is working on his fourth consecutive season with 18 points, 5 assists and 5 rebounds, and is perennially in the top five in steals. That’s all great. But the problem with Iggy is that he’s shown little to no improvement over his five year career, and Philly hasn’t finished above .500 since he was drafted in 2004. And this year has been their worst season yet in terms of winning percentage. And I’m not saying that has anything to do with the heralded return of (All-Star) Allen Iverson. But it does make you wonder …
31. Josh Smith
The best shot blocker in the NBA, one of the most athletic players in history of the NBA, and a do-it-all forward for the surprisingly awesome Atlanta Hawks. He scores 15 per game, racks up 8+ rebounds and about 4 assists, and has 1.5 steals to go with his almost league-leading 2.2 blocks per game. Among non-centers, he has a full block per game more than anyone else. Also, he is shooting above 50% this season for the first time in his career; on a related note, he has attempted only 3 three-pointers this season, whereas over the past four seasons he chucked up an average of 112 per season, missing the great majority of those shots. He has finally learned not to shoot stupid shots, and that’s a huge accomplishment in the NBA.
30. Jason Kidd
Props to J-Kidd for finally learning to shoot the ball at this late stage in his career. After 15 years in the NBA, he is shooting a career high percentage this year: 43%. Which is awful for most players. But for Kidd, it’s a major improvement over his career average of 40%. Part of that success is that he’s nailing 41% of his shots from behind the arc, which is excellent. Of course, Kidd has maintained his usual spot in the top five in assists per game with 9+, and seems to have finally given up his obsession with triple-doubles and pilfering rebounds from his teammates; his rpg is down to 5.3, compared to the 7’s and 8’s he’s averaged over the past decade. Which is probably a good thing for Dallas, because when a guy aims for triple-doubles rather than wins, it doesn’t help the team.
29. David Lee
Holds the distinguished honor of being the best Non-International White Dude in the NBA. But he’s more than just a great white guy. He’s actually a terrific player. He’s averaging 11 rebounds for the second straight season, and has upped his ppg from 16 to 19, and also his assists, FG% and FT%. In fact, he’s averaging a full 5 assists per game in January, which is unbelievable for a center. Especially a big white goofy center on the disastrous Knicks.
32. Andre Iguodala
The poster boy for “Best Player on a Crappy Team.” He is working on his fourth consecutive season with 18 points, 5 assists and 5 rebounds, and is perennially in the top five in steals. That’s all great. But the problem with Iggy is that he’s shown little to no improvement over his five year career, and Philly hasn’t finished above .500 since he was drafted in 2004. And this year has been their worst season yet in terms of winning percentage. And I’m not saying that has anything to do with the heralded return of (All-Star) Allen Iverson. But it does make you wonder …
31. Josh Smith
The best shot blocker in the NBA, one of the most athletic players in history of the NBA, and a do-it-all forward for the surprisingly awesome Atlanta Hawks. He scores 15 per game, racks up 8+ rebounds and about 4 assists, and has 1.5 steals to go with his almost league-leading 2.2 blocks per game. Among non-centers, he has a full block per game more than anyone else. Also, he is shooting above 50% this season for the first time in his career; on a related note, he has attempted only 3 three-pointers this season, whereas over the past four seasons he chucked up an average of 112 per season, missing the great majority of those shots. He has finally learned not to shoot stupid shots, and that’s a huge accomplishment in the NBA.
30. Jason Kidd
Props to J-Kidd for finally learning to shoot the ball at this late stage in his career. After 15 years in the NBA, he is shooting a career high percentage this year: 43%. Which is awful for most players. But for Kidd, it’s a major improvement over his career average of 40%. Part of that success is that he’s nailing 41% of his shots from behind the arc, which is excellent. Of course, Kidd has maintained his usual spot in the top five in assists per game with 9+, and seems to have finally given up his obsession with triple-doubles and pilfering rebounds from his teammates; his rpg is down to 5.3, compared to the 7’s and 8’s he’s averaged over the past decade. Which is probably a good thing for Dallas, because when a guy aims for triple-doubles rather than wins, it doesn’t help the team.
29. David Lee
Holds the distinguished honor of being the best Non-International White Dude in the NBA. But he’s more than just a great white guy. He’s actually a terrific player. He’s averaging 11 rebounds for the second straight season, and has upped his ppg from 16 to 19, and also his assists, FG% and FT%. In fact, he’s averaging a full 5 assists per game in January, which is unbelievable for a center. Especially a big white goofy center on the disastrous Knicks.
The good news? Lee is the best American-born white guy in the NBA. The bad news? He's still on the Knicks.
28. Ray Allen
I know he looks a lot better on the stacked Celtics than he did floundering away in Seattle, but I still can’t ignore how quickly he has climbed from a top 20 shooting guard to a top 5 shooting guard. Part of that is because of the decline of T-Mac, Vince, Rip, Manu and several other marquee SGs. But Ray is still the same player he was when he averaged 25 a game over 5 seasons in Seattle, only now he takes a lot less shots. He’s still a 90% FT, 40% 3pt, 46% from the field kind of guy and a deadly scorer in the clutch.
27. Tony Parker
Just like all the Spurs, Mr. Longoria is having an underwhelming statistical season, but remains a great player. The Spurs are a lot like the Patriots of the NBA: gruff, mean coach, a sense of entitlement, and they don’t really turn it on until the postseason. They probably peaked at around the same time as New England too, about four years ago. But if Tim the equivalent of Tom (Duncan-Brady), I think that makes Tony Parker the Wes Welker of the NBA. Tough. Little. Kind of cute in a rugged way. Not afraid to get bullied by the bigger guys and jump right back up. Welker leads the NFL in catches across the middle. Parker leads all NBA guards in points in the paint. That’s why he shoots almost 50% from the field and is able to score and dominate games without taking too many shots.
26. Monta Ellis
Unless you play fantasy basketball or watch a lot of Warriors games, you might not know anything about tiny Monta Ellis. But the dude averages 26.7 points per game, leads the Western Conference in minutes per game and has the sixth best scoring average in the NBA. Ellis also offers a solid 5 assists per game from the 2 position, and is second in the NBA in steals per game, behind only Rondo. He’s extremely explosive and impossible to defend, in both the transition and the half-court offense. Sort of like an old-school Iverson, without all the nonsense.
25. Rudy Gay
When the Grizzlies drafted Kevin Love with the 5th overall pick two years ago, it looked like we were bound for a Gay-Love era in Memphis for many years to come, which would have been awesome. Can you imagine … “Gay … to Love … back to Gay … he scores!” It was too good to be true ... but Love was traded for OJ Mayo, among others. Now we have the Gay-Mayo connection, which isn’t bad either. But anyways, Rudy Gay is quietly having a great season with the Grizz, scoring 20 with 6 boards and 1.5 steals. In fact, I have him ranked as the seventh best small forward in the NBA, which is incredible considering how stacked the 3 position is this year. To go back to the point about the emergence of the Memphis Grizzlies (see #35), ever since they began the season 1-8 and looked destined for another awful year, they have won 22 of 33 games, giving them the second best winning percentage in the West since mid-November and a legit shot at the playoffs. Wow.
I know he looks a lot better on the stacked Celtics than he did floundering away in Seattle, but I still can’t ignore how quickly he has climbed from a top 20 shooting guard to a top 5 shooting guard. Part of that is because of the decline of T-Mac, Vince, Rip, Manu and several other marquee SGs. But Ray is still the same player he was when he averaged 25 a game over 5 seasons in Seattle, only now he takes a lot less shots. He’s still a 90% FT, 40% 3pt, 46% from the field kind of guy and a deadly scorer in the clutch.
27. Tony Parker
Just like all the Spurs, Mr. Longoria is having an underwhelming statistical season, but remains a great player. The Spurs are a lot like the Patriots of the NBA: gruff, mean coach, a sense of entitlement, and they don’t really turn it on until the postseason. They probably peaked at around the same time as New England too, about four years ago. But if Tim the equivalent of Tom (Duncan-Brady), I think that makes Tony Parker the Wes Welker of the NBA. Tough. Little. Kind of cute in a rugged way. Not afraid to get bullied by the bigger guys and jump right back up. Welker leads the NFL in catches across the middle. Parker leads all NBA guards in points in the paint. That’s why he shoots almost 50% from the field and is able to score and dominate games without taking too many shots.
26. Monta Ellis
Unless you play fantasy basketball or watch a lot of Warriors games, you might not know anything about tiny Monta Ellis. But the dude averages 26.7 points per game, leads the Western Conference in minutes per game and has the sixth best scoring average in the NBA. Ellis also offers a solid 5 assists per game from the 2 position, and is second in the NBA in steals per game, behind only Rondo. He’s extremely explosive and impossible to defend, in both the transition and the half-court offense. Sort of like an old-school Iverson, without all the nonsense.
25. Rudy Gay
When the Grizzlies drafted Kevin Love with the 5th overall pick two years ago, it looked like we were bound for a Gay-Love era in Memphis for many years to come, which would have been awesome. Can you imagine … “Gay … to Love … back to Gay … he scores!” It was too good to be true ... but Love was traded for OJ Mayo, among others. Now we have the Gay-Mayo connection, which isn’t bad either. But anyways, Rudy Gay is quietly having a great season with the Grizz, scoring 20 with 6 boards and 1.5 steals. In fact, I have him ranked as the seventh best small forward in the NBA, which is incredible considering how stacked the 3 position is this year. To go back to the point about the emergence of the Memphis Grizzlies (see #35), ever since they began the season 1-8 and looked destined for another awful year, they have won 22 of 33 games, giving them the second best winning percentage in the West since mid-November and a legit shot at the playoffs. Wow.
24. Derrick Rose
Last year’s ROY had one of the most memorable first-round playoff battles of all time against Boston in 2009, losing in seven games after a combined seven OTs. After averaging 16-6-4 as a rookie, he notched averages of 20-6-6 in the playoffs, which is the kind of improvement you want to see from a player in the postseason. (Granted, half of those games went into OT and thus the numbers are inflated). But still, there’s no question he played his best ball of the season in the playoffs. This year he’s averaging a very solid 19-6-4 and carrying the Bulls on his shoulders, literally. Okay, not literally. But almost.
Last year’s ROY had one of the most memorable first-round playoff battles of all time against Boston in 2009, losing in seven games after a combined seven OTs. After averaging 16-6-4 as a rookie, he notched averages of 20-6-6 in the playoffs, which is the kind of improvement you want to see from a player in the postseason. (Granted, half of those games went into OT and thus the numbers are inflated). But still, there’s no question he played his best ball of the season in the playoffs. This year he’s averaging a very solid 19-6-4 and carrying the Bulls on his shoulders, literally. Okay, not literally. But almost.
23. Rajon Rondo
Statistically, I could have ranked Rondo as high as #10. He’s top five in the NBA in assists, leads everybody in steals, scores 14 per game on 52% shooting and grabs 4 rebounds per game. On top of that, he’s probably the peskiest on-the-ball defender in the NBA. He’s really, really good. But, the reason why he’s only ranked #23 … simply put, he plays for the Celtics. And when you play PG next to 3 All Stars and a handful of solid role players, you should be able to perform well statistically. And you’ve got to shoot better than 58% from the free throw line. Seriously.
Statistically, I could have ranked Rondo as high as #10. He’s top five in the NBA in assists, leads everybody in steals, scores 14 per game on 52% shooting and grabs 4 rebounds per game. On top of that, he’s probably the peskiest on-the-ball defender in the NBA. He’s really, really good. But, the reason why he’s only ranked #23 … simply put, he plays for the Celtics. And when you play PG next to 3 All Stars and a handful of solid role players, you should be able to perform well statistically. And you’ve got to shoot better than 58% from the free throw line. Seriously.
22. Amare Stoudemire
No question that Amaré is a super freakish athlete and a dominant big man in certain phases of the game. He’s powerful and fast, unstoppable in transition, and can score off the pick and roll better than almost any big man. But he has definite flaws, including a failure to develop a low post move that makes him double-team worthy. He’s a poor rebounder given his size (only 8.7 per game) and a liability on the defensive end. My feeling is that after 5+ seasons of relying on Nash to run the Suns offense and set him up for the easiest monster dunks in history, Amaré has become a little overly-dependent on Nash, and isn’t great at scoring on his own. In fact, when the inevitable day comes that Nash and Stoudemire are separated, I wouldn’t expect him (Amaré) to keep scoring 20 a night, or even close to that.
No question that Amaré is a super freakish athlete and a dominant big man in certain phases of the game. He’s powerful and fast, unstoppable in transition, and can score off the pick and roll better than almost any big man. But he has definite flaws, including a failure to develop a low post move that makes him double-team worthy. He’s a poor rebounder given his size (only 8.7 per game) and a liability on the defensive end. My feeling is that after 5+ seasons of relying on Nash to run the Suns offense and set him up for the easiest monster dunks in history, Amaré has become a little overly-dependent on Nash, and isn’t great at scoring on his own. In fact, when the inevitable day comes that Nash and Stoudemire are separated, I wouldn’t expect him (Amaré) to keep scoring 20 a night, or even close to that.
21. Kevin Garnett
I really wasn’t sure where to rank Garnett to be honest. He’s been sitting out for nearly a month with an injury, after missing 30 games and the entire playoffs last season. And when he has played this year, it’s been a modest 15 and 8, and only 30 minutes on the court. His days of being a 14 rebound, 2 block Defensive MVP are over. But for one season and one season only, I’m not sure how many players I would rather have than KG. Look at what he did when he joined the 24-win Celtics in 2007: won 66 games and an NBA title in his first season in green. I know he’s a couple years older now than he was then, but I think he’s still the same player and I know he’s still the same fiery leader and psycho-fierce competitor. Last year he sat out the entire playoffs; this year, if he’s at 100%, or even 80% health, I don’t think anyone in the East can beat Boston.
I really wasn’t sure where to rank Garnett to be honest. He’s been sitting out for nearly a month with an injury, after missing 30 games and the entire playoffs last season. And when he has played this year, it’s been a modest 15 and 8, and only 30 minutes on the court. His days of being a 14 rebound, 2 block Defensive MVP are over. But for one season and one season only, I’m not sure how many players I would rather have than KG. Look at what he did when he joined the 24-win Celtics in 2007: won 66 games and an NBA title in his first season in green. I know he’s a couple years older now than he was then, but I think he’s still the same player and I know he’s still the same fiery leader and psycho-fierce competitor. Last year he sat out the entire playoffs; this year, if he’s at 100%, or even 80% health, I don’t think anyone in the East can beat Boston.
20. Al Jefferson
The guy (well, one of the 7 guys) that Boston traded to obtain Garnett two years ago has really come into his own in Minnesota, averaging a consistent 20 and 11 over the past three seasons. Although the Wolves are a wretched 9-34, and started the season 1-14, you can’t blame Jefferson for that. He really swapped placed with Garnett in more ways than one, because now he’s stuck being the only good player on a crappy Minnesota team, a role that KG occupied for a decade. Jefferson started this season out slow, averaging just 16 points and 7 rebounds over the first month of the season, but that was primarily because of the nagging knee injury that sidelined him for most of 2008. Since December, he’s up to his usual 20 and 11 per game, and shooting a solid 50% from the field. He’s one of the precious few big men in the league who know how to use their size to dominate the paint on both ends of the court, and command double teams. In a league full of goofy 7-foot international players who shoot the 3 and stay out of the paint, it’s nice to have a big monster like Jefferson to remind us of the good old days.
The guy (well, one of the 7 guys) that Boston traded to obtain Garnett two years ago has really come into his own in Minnesota, averaging a consistent 20 and 11 over the past three seasons. Although the Wolves are a wretched 9-34, and started the season 1-14, you can’t blame Jefferson for that. He really swapped placed with Garnett in more ways than one, because now he’s stuck being the only good player on a crappy Minnesota team, a role that KG occupied for a decade. Jefferson started this season out slow, averaging just 16 points and 7 rebounds over the first month of the season, but that was primarily because of the nagging knee injury that sidelined him for most of 2008. Since December, he’s up to his usual 20 and 11 per game, and shooting a solid 50% from the field. He’s one of the precious few big men in the league who know how to use their size to dominate the paint on both ends of the court, and command double teams. In a league full of goofy 7-foot international players who shoot the 3 and stay out of the paint, it’s nice to have a big monster like Jefferson to remind us of the good old days.
19. Pau Gasol
Speaking of goofy, 7-foot international players … The big Spaniard is averaging a very respectable 17 and 11 this year, shooting 54% with 1.5 blocks and 85% from the line. Great. He also guest starred on CSI Miami earlier this year.
18. Danny Granger
First of all, this guy desperately needs a nickname. Partly because of his boring name, and partly because of his rising superstar status. Last year he finished fifth in the league in scoring without anybody noticing. This year he’s in seventh, despite having a torn plantar fascia, whatever that is. His numbers have dropped across the board (points, rebounds, blocks, and all percentages) but he’s still having a stellar season, he’s still a highly efficient scorer, and he is playing injured. It’s gotta be tough being the only black guy on the Indiana Pacers.
Speaking of goofy, 7-foot international players … The big Spaniard is averaging a very respectable 17 and 11 this year, shooting 54% with 1.5 blocks and 85% from the line. Great. He also guest starred on CSI Miami earlier this year.
18. Danny Granger
First of all, this guy desperately needs a nickname. Partly because of his boring name, and partly because of his rising superstar status. Last year he finished fifth in the league in scoring without anybody noticing. This year he’s in seventh, despite having a torn plantar fascia, whatever that is. His numbers have dropped across the board (points, rebounds, blocks, and all percentages) but he’s still having a stellar season, he’s still a highly efficient scorer, and he is playing injured. It’s gotta be tough being the only black guy on the Indiana Pacers.
Granger celebrating with one of his many goofy white teammates.
17. Chauncey Billups
16. Deron Williams
I’m grouping these two together, even though they are quite different players at very different stages in their careers. But in my mind, there is a clear 1-2-3 ranking of NBA point guards, which will be revealed in a moment, and then these two are deadlocked for 4-5, and I think they’ve distanced themselves from Rondo, Kidd, Parker and the rest of the pack. It’s tough for me to put either guy ahead of the other. Both guys are more concerned with winning than stats, and that’s the key. Williams is a bit faster, a bit more athletic, and a better passer, as well as a better scorer in traffic. But Chauncey is the consummate leader, the most poised point guard in the NBA, and the definition of ‘swagger.’ He has the better three-ball, and uses his physical strength to back down smaller guards and score when he wants to. But both guys know how to defer to their teammates, especially Boozer and ‘Melo, and both have their teams in great shape to make a playoff run.
15. Gerald Wallace
Dwight Howard is probably going to win D-MVP this season, and he does deserve it. But if the voters gave the award to Gerald Wallace instead, I wouldn’t object. Gerald has easily surpassed both Ben and Rasheed as the best ‘Wallace’ in the NBA on defense, and was already considerably better on the offensive end. In fact, he’s raced past just about every player in the NBA except maybe Howard when it comes to contesting shots, pulling down rebounds and dominating the defensive end. He can honestly defend the opposing team’s best player, position 1-5, and that is a very rare ability. Big Ben was too slow to guard 1’s; Artest is too small to guard 5’s; the only guy I can think of who could guard 1-5 would be an early 90s Dennis Rodman. He (Gerald) averages 1.7 steals and 1.2 blocks a game along with 11+ rebounds, and does countless hustle plays every night that don’t show up on the stat sheet. He’s not a slouch on offense either, scoring 19 ppg and shooting 48% from the field.
16. Deron Williams
I’m grouping these two together, even though they are quite different players at very different stages in their careers. But in my mind, there is a clear 1-2-3 ranking of NBA point guards, which will be revealed in a moment, and then these two are deadlocked for 4-5, and I think they’ve distanced themselves from Rondo, Kidd, Parker and the rest of the pack. It’s tough for me to put either guy ahead of the other. Both guys are more concerned with winning than stats, and that’s the key. Williams is a bit faster, a bit more athletic, and a better passer, as well as a better scorer in traffic. But Chauncey is the consummate leader, the most poised point guard in the NBA, and the definition of ‘swagger.’ He has the better three-ball, and uses his physical strength to back down smaller guards and score when he wants to. But both guys know how to defer to their teammates, especially Boozer and ‘Melo, and both have their teams in great shape to make a playoff run.
15. Gerald Wallace
Dwight Howard is probably going to win D-MVP this season, and he does deserve it. But if the voters gave the award to Gerald Wallace instead, I wouldn’t object. Gerald has easily surpassed both Ben and Rasheed as the best ‘Wallace’ in the NBA on defense, and was already considerably better on the offensive end. In fact, he’s raced past just about every player in the NBA except maybe Howard when it comes to contesting shots, pulling down rebounds and dominating the defensive end. He can honestly defend the opposing team’s best player, position 1-5, and that is a very rare ability. Big Ben was too slow to guard 1’s; Artest is too small to guard 5’s; the only guy I can think of who could guard 1-5 would be an early 90s Dennis Rodman. He (Gerald) averages 1.7 steals and 1.2 blocks a game along with 11+ rebounds, and does countless hustle plays every night that don’t show up on the stat sheet. He’s not a slouch on offense either, scoring 19 ppg and shooting 48% from the field.
14. Paul Pierce
Although Pierce is posting the lowest ppg and rpg totals since his rookie season, I actually think he’s having the best year of his career. He’s still giving the C’s 19 points, 5 rebounds and 4 assists per game, and his percentages are the highest they’ve ever been all the way across the board – 47% from the field, 84% from the line, and an exceptional 47% from downtown. Of the guys who shoot 45% or better from long-range, Pierce is the only one who scores more than 10 per game. His PPS (points per shot) is 8th best in the league. The scary thing is: Pierce makes four Celtics in the top 30. If the Pistons were still a playoff team, I’d be worried.
13. Joe Johnson
For the fifth straight year, JJ is right on the brink of being a 20-5-5 guy, and while his numbers haven’t drastically improved in recent years, his team’s winning percentage has, and that’s what matters. Joe is shooting 35% from three-point land, 83% from the free-throw line, and has the Hawks currently tied with Orlando for the Southeast Division and the third seed in the East. There’s nothing flashy or boisterous about his game, just good old-fashioned running around and shooting. He’s like a more athletic, better shooting, less whiny version of Rip Hamilton.
Although Pierce is posting the lowest ppg and rpg totals since his rookie season, I actually think he’s having the best year of his career. He’s still giving the C’s 19 points, 5 rebounds and 4 assists per game, and his percentages are the highest they’ve ever been all the way across the board – 47% from the field, 84% from the line, and an exceptional 47% from downtown. Of the guys who shoot 45% or better from long-range, Pierce is the only one who scores more than 10 per game. His PPS (points per shot) is 8th best in the league. The scary thing is: Pierce makes four Celtics in the top 30. If the Pistons were still a playoff team, I’d be worried.
13. Joe Johnson
For the fifth straight year, JJ is right on the brink of being a 20-5-5 guy, and while his numbers haven’t drastically improved in recent years, his team’s winning percentage has, and that’s what matters. Joe is shooting 35% from three-point land, 83% from the free-throw line, and has the Hawks currently tied with Orlando for the Southeast Division and the third seed in the East. There’s nothing flashy or boisterous about his game, just good old-fashioned running around and shooting. He’s like a more athletic, better shooting, less whiny version of Rip Hamilton.
12. Tim Duncan
In his 13 year Spur career, Timmy has averaged a phenomenally consistent 21 and 12; he's never scored less than 18.6 in a season, and never had less than 10 boards. His block per game totals have wavered from the 1.9 to 2.9 range, and his FG shooting has never fallen below 49%. As I've said before, he's the most consistent superstar of our generation. This year: 19.9 points, 15.5 boards, 1.8 blocks, and 3.1 assists - the most of any center in the NBA. His FG% is a career high 54% and his FT% is also a career high. And amazingly, he's doing this all with a career low in minutes. And oh by the way, the Spurs haven't missed the playoffs since Timmy was drafted #1 overall in 1997, they've won 4 championships and only lost in the first round twice, and are on pace to win 50+ games for the 13th straight season.
In his 13 year Spur career, Timmy has averaged a phenomenally consistent 21 and 12; he's never scored less than 18.6 in a season, and never had less than 10 boards. His block per game totals have wavered from the 1.9 to 2.9 range, and his FG shooting has never fallen below 49%. As I've said before, he's the most consistent superstar of our generation. This year: 19.9 points, 15.5 boards, 1.8 blocks, and 3.1 assists - the most of any center in the NBA. His FG% is a career high 54% and his FT% is also a career high. And amazingly, he's doing this all with a career low in minutes. And oh by the way, the Spurs haven't missed the playoffs since Timmy was drafted #1 overall in 1997, they've won 4 championships and only lost in the first round twice, and are on pace to win 50+ games for the 13th straight season.
11. Brandon Roy
It can't be easy to be the franchise player on the bad-luck Blazers, where injuries abound and epic flops like Greg Oden roam the streets. But Brandon Roy has filled that role beautifully, and has guided the Blazers to another very respectable season. With respect to CP3 and Kobe, Roy is probably the best two-way guard in the NBA; meaning that while he averages a rock solid 23 points and 5 assists, he also deserves mention for the All Defense First Team. His steals numbers are just modest, but any analyst will tell you that his relentless on-the-ball defense is unparalleled, and that's a main reason why Portand allows the fewest points per game in the Western Conference. If you have a few minutes to kill, do a Youtube search for Roy and there are countless plays that literally left me jaw-dropped; the crossover on Wade, the dunk on Dalembert, and the move that made Matt Barnes fall down, just to name a few. If nothing else, check out this play. Unreal.
10. Dwayne Wade
You probably think this is too low a ranking for D-Wade, but I actually thought long and hard about swapping him and Roy, thus knocking Wade out of the top 10. Of all the players who rank in the top 20 in ppg, Wade’s shooting percentage is the worst. He continues to jack up three while shooting one of the worst 3pt% in the league (a habit that he can’t seem to kick); and most importantly, the Heat struggle to win games. They haven't won 45 games since 2005. Intangibles like leadership and unselfishness and poise are infinitely important in basketball, and none of those things are Wade’s forte. He likes to drive, shoot, and be on Sportscenter; until he refocuses his game on winning and using his teammates, Wade is destined to a disappointing career.
9. Chris Bosh
One of the great tragedy’s of the NBA is that Chris Bosh’s years of playing for the Raptors while simultaneously looking like a Raptor are almost over. After the Summer of 2010, he’ll be playing somewhere else. Outside of that though, he’s having another great year: 24 ppg and 11 rpg (top 8 in the NBA in both categories), 52% from the floor (the best percentage of anyone in the top 10 in scoring) and a solid 78% from the free throw line – where he shoots from more than any big guy in the league except Howard. He leads the NBA in double-doubles. Just a great season from one of the many All Stars the Pistons could have drafted instead of Darko.
8. Kevin Durant
The numbers alone are staggering in Durant’s third season in the NBA: 29 ppg, 7 rpg, 48% from the field, and 87% from the FT line. His points per game have steadily increased in each season, from 20 to 25 to now almost 30, and the scary thing is: he’s just now getting good. He’s the only player in the NBA other than LeBron who really has no ceiling on how great he can be. He’s a do-it-all scorer and makes it look purely effortless. KD is currently third in the NBA in scoring and is breathing down the necks of Carmelo and LeBron for the scoring title. Over the past month, Durant has averaged more than 32 per game while shooting 55%, and at that rate he’s gong to blow past them both. He’s made more free throws than anybody in the NBA by almost 50. And the best part of everything is … oh yeah, Oklahoma City is finally winning games. In Durant’s rookie year, they (then in Seattle) finished with a horrid 20 wins; last year they won only 23; so far this season, Durant has led them to a 24-19 start and a good shot at the playoffs. If he doesn’t win Most Improved Player this year, it’s a sham.
You probably think this is too low a ranking for D-Wade, but I actually thought long and hard about swapping him and Roy, thus knocking Wade out of the top 10. Of all the players who rank in the top 20 in ppg, Wade’s shooting percentage is the worst. He continues to jack up three while shooting one of the worst 3pt% in the league (a habit that he can’t seem to kick); and most importantly, the Heat struggle to win games. They haven't won 45 games since 2005. Intangibles like leadership and unselfishness and poise are infinitely important in basketball, and none of those things are Wade’s forte. He likes to drive, shoot, and be on Sportscenter; until he refocuses his game on winning and using his teammates, Wade is destined to a disappointing career.
9. Chris Bosh
One of the great tragedy’s of the NBA is that Chris Bosh’s years of playing for the Raptors while simultaneously looking like a Raptor are almost over. After the Summer of 2010, he’ll be playing somewhere else. Outside of that though, he’s having another great year: 24 ppg and 11 rpg (top 8 in the NBA in both categories), 52% from the floor (the best percentage of anyone in the top 10 in scoring) and a solid 78% from the free throw line – where he shoots from more than any big guy in the league except Howard. He leads the NBA in double-doubles. Just a great season from one of the many All Stars the Pistons could have drafted instead of Darko.
8. Kevin Durant
The numbers alone are staggering in Durant’s third season in the NBA: 29 ppg, 7 rpg, 48% from the field, and 87% from the FT line. His points per game have steadily increased in each season, from 20 to 25 to now almost 30, and the scary thing is: he’s just now getting good. He’s the only player in the NBA other than LeBron who really has no ceiling on how great he can be. He’s a do-it-all scorer and makes it look purely effortless. KD is currently third in the NBA in scoring and is breathing down the necks of Carmelo and LeBron for the scoring title. Over the past month, Durant has averaged more than 32 per game while shooting 55%, and at that rate he’s gong to blow past them both. He’s made more free throws than anybody in the NBA by almost 50. And the best part of everything is … oh yeah, Oklahoma City is finally winning games. In Durant’s rookie year, they (then in Seattle) finished with a horrid 20 wins; last year they won only 23; so far this season, Durant has led them to a 24-19 start and a good shot at the playoffs. If he doesn’t win Most Improved Player this year, it’s a sham.
Guess which one of these guys scores more points per game? Hint: it's not the one you'd expect.
7. Chris Paul
2007 was CP3’s breakout year. 2008 was his MVP-caliber year. 2009, thus far, has been his year of regression. Scoring is down from 22.8 to 19.5. Steals are down from 2.8 to 2.3. FG% and FT% are down. Rebounds are down. And the Hornets winning percentage is down. They’re only .537 right now, but finished .598 and .683 the two previous seasons. It’s been a rough year for Chris Paul; his teammates have been disappointing at best, and those Old Spice commercials are terrible. A far cry from last year, when I ranked him #2, above Kobe.
6. Dwight Howard
Superman is poised to win his second consecutive Defensive MVP award, averaging an unseemly 13 rebounds and 2.4 blocks per game, both league-leading marks. He also shoots 60% from the field and commands double, triple and sometimes quadruple teams in the paint. Simply put, he’s the most feared big man alive and the most dominant defensive player in the NBA. That’s the good news. The bad news is that his scoring average has dipped from 20 to 17, and that’s largely due to his grotesque free throw shooting - under 60%. If he can solve the free-throw shooting conundrum, he could become one of the all-time greats at center and could easily score 25 per game. If not, he’ll be an offensive liability and the Hack-A-Howard crap will start. I’m surprised it hasn’t already.
2007 was CP3’s breakout year. 2008 was his MVP-caliber year. 2009, thus far, has been his year of regression. Scoring is down from 22.8 to 19.5. Steals are down from 2.8 to 2.3. FG% and FT% are down. Rebounds are down. And the Hornets winning percentage is down. They’re only .537 right now, but finished .598 and .683 the two previous seasons. It’s been a rough year for Chris Paul; his teammates have been disappointing at best, and those Old Spice commercials are terrible. A far cry from last year, when I ranked him #2, above Kobe.
6. Dwight Howard
Superman is poised to win his second consecutive Defensive MVP award, averaging an unseemly 13 rebounds and 2.4 blocks per game, both league-leading marks. He also shoots 60% from the field and commands double, triple and sometimes quadruple teams in the paint. Simply put, he’s the most feared big man alive and the most dominant defensive player in the NBA. That’s the good news. The bad news is that his scoring average has dipped from 20 to 17, and that’s largely due to his grotesque free throw shooting - under 60%. If he can solve the free-throw shooting conundrum, he could become one of the all-time greats at center and could easily score 25 per game. If not, he’ll be an offensive liability and the Hack-A-Howard crap will start. I’m surprised it hasn’t already.
5. Steve Nash
The 19 points and 11 assists are impressive. The fact that Nash has single-handedly kept the Suns competitive in the West and has them in position to have home-court advantage in the first round of the playoffs is huge. But the most impressive thing is the percentages: 53% from the field. (Best of any point guard). 95% from the stripe (best of anyone in the NBA). 43% from downtown. Unbelievable. He has reclaimed his title as the best point guard in the world.
4. Dirk Nowitzki
Nobody who ranks in the top 20 in scoring per game has a better 3-point percentage than Dirk’s 38%, and nobody tops his 88% FT percentage either. His 25.5 ppg is the best of any big man in the NBA, and he averages a reasonable 8 rebounds and 1 block per game – numbers that should be higher considering he is 7-foot, but aren’t terrible. He really is the epitome of an inside-outside threat, and can score from anywhere on the court. And here's the kicker: the Mavericks have won at least 50 games in every single season since 2000 (when Dirk became a full-time starter), and are on pace to do it again.
3. Carmelo Anthony
I could go on and on about how ‘Melo has really developed as a player and dropped his selfish, thuggish reputation and become one of the most reliable and dominant scorers in the NBA and become a team player and is utterly lethal at scoring in transition, in the paint, from the perimeter, in mid-range and at the free-throw line where he has improved his percentage by almost 7% this year, and how he has turned Denver into a consistent winner and one of the best teams in the NBA and is the third best player in the NBA right now … but instead, I’d like to do a little comparison between Carmelo and the guy who was drafted one pick ahead of ‘Melo in 2003. Carmelo’s career scoring average: 24.6. Darko’s: 5.4. Carmelo’s games started over the past two seasons: 104. Darko’s: 15. Times Carmelo has scored 30 or more in a game: 143. Darko’s career scoring high: 21. Let’s give a big, sarcastic round of applause for Joe Dumars.
3. Carmelo Anthony
I could go on and on about how ‘Melo has really developed as a player and dropped his selfish, thuggish reputation and become one of the most reliable and dominant scorers in the NBA and become a team player and is utterly lethal at scoring in transition, in the paint, from the perimeter, in mid-range and at the free-throw line where he has improved his percentage by almost 7% this year, and how he has turned Denver into a consistent winner and one of the best teams in the NBA and is the third best player in the NBA right now … but instead, I’d like to do a little comparison between Carmelo and the guy who was drafted one pick ahead of ‘Melo in 2003. Carmelo’s career scoring average: 24.6. Darko’s: 5.4. Carmelo’s games started over the past two seasons: 104. Darko’s: 15. Times Carmelo has scored 30 or more in a game: 143. Darko’s career scoring high: 21. Let’s give a big, sarcastic round of applause for Joe Dumars.
(giant chasm)
2. LeBron James
“The Chosen One” lost a lot of my respect when he couldn’t beat the Magic in the ECFs last year. “The King” needs to win at least one NBA Finals game in the first decade of his career. “The Almighty” spends a little too much time worrying about what jersey he’s going to wear in 2010, and a little too little time worrying about winning in the playoffs. Okay I made that last nickname up. But LeBron, for all his statistical amazingness and unparalleled physical ability, was surpassed sometime last postseason by a guy who’s refusal to lose is truly only paralleled by Michael Jordan. This season has been a great one for LBJ; I mean, you can’t exactly sneeze at 29 points (almost 30), 7 boards, 7.8 assists, 1.5 steals, 51% FG and a 31-11 record. But the reasons I’m moving him from #1 to #2 are twofold: first, I don’t trust him to win in the playoffs. I don’t think Cleveland is a lock to beat Orlando, Boston, or Atlanta. And I know his teammates aren’t great, but that’s not an excuse anymore. If LeBron was actually as great as he thinks he is, he wouldn’t need great teammates. He would make them great. And the second reason is that LeBron has spent the entire 2009 season with his head in the clouds, thinking about the 2010 offseason and the enormous $$$ offers he’s going to see from the Knicks and Nets and Clippers and everyone else, and I don’t think he has the focus and sheer competitiveness to sleepwalk through the playoffs the way he’s been sleepwalking through the regular season. I actually think that deep down he wants to lose in the playoffs, because then he has a legit reason to leave Cleveland next season. And we all know he wants out.
1. Kobe Bryant
Statistically, it’s no comparison between Kobe and LeBron. Physically, it’s no contest either. So why am I moving Kobe from #3 last year to #1 this year, when he’s past his physical prime and in the middle of a month-long statistical downslide? Partly, because he’s the only player in the NBA who would simultaneously play with back spasms, a hyperextended knee, and an broken finger on his shooting hand, while continuing to score 25+. Partly because Kobe was poised to win the scoring title before all the injuries forced a drop in his minutes, but he has continued to play limited minutes, even though he is fully aware that he is steadily dropping out of the top 5 in ppg. The old Kobe Bryant would have let that bother him, and would have probably sat the bench until he was 100%. But the wonderful thing about the new Kobe is that at this point in his career, he no longer cares about winning the scoring title. All he cares about is winning in June. And because of that, for the first time in Kobe’s tumultuous 13 year career, he can finally be compared to Michael Jordan.
For the longest time, the common knock on Kobe’s career was that he couldn’t win a championship without Shaq. Last year, he proved that wrong. Sure he had a great supporting cast with Gasol, Bynum, Ariza and Odom, but he was undeniably the best player in the world during last year’s playoffs. Shaq or no Shaq, Kobe legitimately owns 4 championship rings, which is more than everyone in the top 10 combined. If I had to bet on any one player in the NBA to singlehandedly win the 2010 championship, it would have to be Kobe.
“The Chosen One” lost a lot of my respect when he couldn’t beat the Magic in the ECFs last year. “The King” needs to win at least one NBA Finals game in the first decade of his career. “The Almighty” spends a little too much time worrying about what jersey he’s going to wear in 2010, and a little too little time worrying about winning in the playoffs. Okay I made that last nickname up. But LeBron, for all his statistical amazingness and unparalleled physical ability, was surpassed sometime last postseason by a guy who’s refusal to lose is truly only paralleled by Michael Jordan. This season has been a great one for LBJ; I mean, you can’t exactly sneeze at 29 points (almost 30), 7 boards, 7.8 assists, 1.5 steals, 51% FG and a 31-11 record. But the reasons I’m moving him from #1 to #2 are twofold: first, I don’t trust him to win in the playoffs. I don’t think Cleveland is a lock to beat Orlando, Boston, or Atlanta. And I know his teammates aren’t great, but that’s not an excuse anymore. If LeBron was actually as great as he thinks he is, he wouldn’t need great teammates. He would make them great. And the second reason is that LeBron has spent the entire 2009 season with his head in the clouds, thinking about the 2010 offseason and the enormous $$$ offers he’s going to see from the Knicks and Nets and Clippers and everyone else, and I don’t think he has the focus and sheer competitiveness to sleepwalk through the playoffs the way he’s been sleepwalking through the regular season. I actually think that deep down he wants to lose in the playoffs, because then he has a legit reason to leave Cleveland next season. And we all know he wants out.
1. Kobe Bryant
Statistically, it’s no comparison between Kobe and LeBron. Physically, it’s no contest either. So why am I moving Kobe from #3 last year to #1 this year, when he’s past his physical prime and in the middle of a month-long statistical downslide? Partly, because he’s the only player in the NBA who would simultaneously play with back spasms, a hyperextended knee, and an broken finger on his shooting hand, while continuing to score 25+. Partly because Kobe was poised to win the scoring title before all the injuries forced a drop in his minutes, but he has continued to play limited minutes, even though he is fully aware that he is steadily dropping out of the top 5 in ppg. The old Kobe Bryant would have let that bother him, and would have probably sat the bench until he was 100%. But the wonderful thing about the new Kobe is that at this point in his career, he no longer cares about winning the scoring title. All he cares about is winning in June. And because of that, for the first time in Kobe’s tumultuous 13 year career, he can finally be compared to Michael Jordan.
For the longest time, the common knock on Kobe’s career was that he couldn’t win a championship without Shaq. Last year, he proved that wrong. Sure he had a great supporting cast with Gasol, Bynum, Ariza and Odom, but he was undeniably the best player in the world during last year’s playoffs. Shaq or no Shaq, Kobe legitimately owns 4 championship rings, which is more than everyone in the top 10 combined. If I had to bet on any one player in the NBA to singlehandedly win the 2010 championship, it would have to be Kobe.
You really can't go wrong either way ...
I hope you enjoyed the list. Let me know your thoughts: who is too high, too low, who should have made the list but didn't, etc. I realize there were no Pistons on the list, even though plenty of guys are talented enough to make it. But between the injuries, the whining, the selfishness, and all the losing, I didn't feel any of them deserved a spot in the top 50. Houston was the only other team to have no players on the list.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
LOST Theory ...
I think I have come up with a reasonable explanation for why Jacob's enemy (Esau, Black Shirt Guy, Smoke Monster Man, whatever you want to call him) doesn't have a name.
Bear with me, I know this sounds ridiculous.
But ...
I think the enemy is
Aaron.
If Claire was not the one to raise Aaron, he was destined to be very dangerous. We know this from season 1, and he wasn't raised by Claire, this much we know. He wasn't raised by Kate either, ultimately it was weirdo Mrs. Littleton who raised him.
I believe that in Aaron's future he goes back to the island, and travels into to the past (maybe he becomes the leader of the 'Others' or something), and lives on the island with Jacob in ancient Egypt in some sort of metaphysical state, until they have some kind of despute and Jacob somehow becomes the grown-up physical form of Aaron (he kind of looks like him - blond, blue-eyed, a little bit retarted looking) - leaving 'Aaron' formless and bodyless. Thus he becomes ... the Black Smoke Monster. And is only able to inhabit dead bodies on the island. (Yemi, Alex, Christian, ... Locke.)
I think he can also inhabit these bodies OFF the island ... thus 'Christian' visiting Jack in LA or 'Charlie' visiting Hurley. Remember, Hurley says to Jack: "Charlie had a message for you too. He said you're not supposed to raise him. You think he means Aaron?"
But then I remembered that it was Christian (Claire's dad) who persuaded her to leave Miles and Sawyer and the gang and come creepily away with him, hanging out in the Cabin. And then I remembered ... this ...
And it got me thinking. HE (Christian, AKA Black Smoke Monster, AKA the guy who is in Locke's body AKA Jacob's Enemy) could touch Aaron. Because ... he was Aaron.
Hmm...
I need to rewatch season 5 and see if post-dead Locke physically touches anyone. That would be a huge clue.
But if this is right... this is awesome.
The last episode of season six could start with Aaron growing up with Mrs. Littleton and go on to tell his entire story, up to adulthood, Island-life, time-travel, Jacob hating, becoming the black smoke monster, and close the Loop of LOST !
POW!
Bear with me, I know this sounds ridiculous.
But ...
I think the enemy is
Aaron.
If Claire was not the one to raise Aaron, he was destined to be very dangerous. We know this from season 1, and he wasn't raised by Claire, this much we know. He wasn't raised by Kate either, ultimately it was weirdo Mrs. Littleton who raised him.
I believe that in Aaron's future he goes back to the island, and travels into to the past (maybe he becomes the leader of the 'Others' or something), and lives on the island with Jacob in ancient Egypt in some sort of metaphysical state, until they have some kind of despute and Jacob somehow becomes the grown-up physical form of Aaron (he kind of looks like him - blond, blue-eyed, a little bit retarted looking) - leaving 'Aaron' formless and bodyless. Thus he becomes ... the Black Smoke Monster. And is only able to inhabit dead bodies on the island. (Yemi, Alex, Christian, ... Locke.)
I think he can also inhabit these bodies OFF the island ... thus 'Christian' visiting Jack in LA or 'Charlie' visiting Hurley. Remember, Hurley says to Jack: "Charlie had a message for you too. He said you're not supposed to raise him. You think he means Aaron?"
Whoa.
I think the bearded, black-shirted dude from the finale of season 5 is just some random guy who was dead, and 'Aaron' used his body to speak with Jacob. He wants to kill Jacob because he wants his body back. And he wants sole supremacy of the island. Yes, I am still talking about sweet little 'turnip-head.'
But the loophole prevents this.
When the Black Smoke Monster becomes people, he does not have direct physical contact with them. (Correct me if I'm wrong). Unless he is in the form of smoke, when he usually beats them to death, or drags them across the ground. Remember when Christian Shepherd refuses to help Locke after he falls. Maybe that's a clue. Maybe he can't touch him.
But then I remembered that it was Christian (Claire's dad) who persuaded her to leave Miles and Sawyer and the gang and come creepily away with him, hanging out in the Cabin. And then I remembered ... this ...
And it got me thinking. HE (Christian, AKA Black Smoke Monster, AKA the guy who is in Locke's body AKA Jacob's Enemy) could touch Aaron. Because ... he was Aaron.
Hmm...
I need to rewatch season 5 and see if post-dead Locke physically touches anyone. That would be a huge clue.
But if this is right... this is awesome.
The last episode of season six could start with Aaron growing up with Mrs. Littleton and go on to tell his entire story, up to adulthood, Island-life, time-travel, Jacob hating, becoming the black smoke monster, and close the Loop of LOST !
POW!
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
Championship Round Picks
Peyton Manning. Drew Brees. Brett Favre. And … Mark Sanchez?
What a weird playoffs.
San Diego started the season a dismal 2-3, and then won 11 games in a row to finish 13-3. And then they lost their first playoff game, to the Jets, who really shouldn’t have made the playoffs in the first place.
Should Norv Turner be fired? Probably not. But Chargers’ fans have got to be puking their hearts out right now. While Jets fans can’t believe their luck.
Mark Sanchez, the rookie QB from USC who gives Tom Brady a run for his money when it comes to looking more like a super model than a quarterback, has led the J-E-T-S to the AFC Championship game, and is just two wins away from winning the freaking Super Bowl.
I use the word ‘led’ loosely. It’s no secret that the Jets run the ball and play great defense, and they don’t ask much from the quarterback. But I have to wonder… if the roles were reversed, and the Lions drafted Sanchez #1 overall, and then the Jets took Matthew Stafford #6, … what would the postseason picture look like right now?
To clear things up, the Lions wouldn’t be any better off. Maybe 3 wins instead of 2. Whatever. Sanchez would have been crushed.
But how would Stafford have fared in the AFC East, behind the NFL’s best offensive line, playing with three good running backs, an excellent tight end, few decent receivers, a Wildcat QB, and the best fullback alive.
I’ll tell you how. 6-10. Maybe 7-9.
I’m under no delusion that Mark Sanchez is the best player on the Jets team. That’s obviously Darelle Revis. In fact, Sanchez isn’t even a top 10 player on that team. (Mangold, Faneca, Jenkins, Richardson, Scott, Harris, Edwards, Keller, Pace, Sheppard, Jones, Cotchery, Washington, and the list goes on…)
Is Sanchez even the best QB on the Jets? Arguably not. Kellen Clemens has done okay in his limited starts.
But how much better is Mark Sanchez than Matt Stafford? Statistically, it’s not all that different. But in real life, game-time situations?
Let me ask this question: if you surrounded Stafford with the NFC Pro Bowl roster and asked him to play against the Chargers, would he be able to beat them? My guess is no. The D would stack the line against the run and force Stafford to pass in man-to-man coverage, and he would throw crappy passes, or get sacked, or make the wrong reads, or throw more crappy passes.
Just because Sanchez isn’t a Pro Bowler doesn’t mean he’s not valuable to the Jets, or that he’s a quality quarterback. He’s not being asked to do much, but he is being asked to do something.
Something that Matt Stafford isn’t able to do at this point in his young, lucrative career.
And that’s all I have to say about that.
Championship Game Picks:
I’m taking the Saints
and the Colts.
Both by at least two touchdowns.
And we should have a really fun Super Bowl.
Although, we’re going to have a fun Super Bowl no matter what …
A Jets-Vikings Super Bowl would be the Brett Favre Revenge Game.
A Colts-Vikings Super Bowl would be the best QB of all time, statistically, against the guy who’s going to beak all his record one day.
And a Jets-Saints Super Bowl would be the best offense in the NFL against the best defense in the NFL.
But what we all really want to see is a Colts-Saints Super Bowl.
The two best QBs in the NFL right now, the two teams that started 13-0.
Two A+ offenses against two pretty good defenses.
An epic game in the making.
Please don’t ruin it, Mark Sanchez.
Last week: 3-1
Playoffs: 3-5
What a weird playoffs.
San Diego started the season a dismal 2-3, and then won 11 games in a row to finish 13-3. And then they lost their first playoff game, to the Jets, who really shouldn’t have made the playoffs in the first place.
Should Norv Turner be fired? Probably not. But Chargers’ fans have got to be puking their hearts out right now. While Jets fans can’t believe their luck.
Mark Sanchez, the rookie QB from USC who gives Tom Brady a run for his money when it comes to looking more like a super model than a quarterback, has led the J-E-T-S to the AFC Championship game, and is just two wins away from winning the freaking Super Bowl.
I use the word ‘led’ loosely. It’s no secret that the Jets run the ball and play great defense, and they don’t ask much from the quarterback. But I have to wonder… if the roles were reversed, and the Lions drafted Sanchez #1 overall, and then the Jets took Matthew Stafford #6, … what would the postseason picture look like right now?
To clear things up, the Lions wouldn’t be any better off. Maybe 3 wins instead of 2. Whatever. Sanchez would have been crushed.
But how would Stafford have fared in the AFC East, behind the NFL’s best offensive line, playing with three good running backs, an excellent tight end, few decent receivers, a Wildcat QB, and the best fullback alive.
I’ll tell you how. 6-10. Maybe 7-9.
I’m under no delusion that Mark Sanchez is the best player on the Jets team. That’s obviously Darelle Revis. In fact, Sanchez isn’t even a top 10 player on that team. (Mangold, Faneca, Jenkins, Richardson, Scott, Harris, Edwards, Keller, Pace, Sheppard, Jones, Cotchery, Washington, and the list goes on…)
Is Sanchez even the best QB on the Jets? Arguably not. Kellen Clemens has done okay in his limited starts.
But how much better is Mark Sanchez than Matt Stafford? Statistically, it’s not all that different. But in real life, game-time situations?
Let me ask this question: if you surrounded Stafford with the NFC Pro Bowl roster and asked him to play against the Chargers, would he be able to beat them? My guess is no. The D would stack the line against the run and force Stafford to pass in man-to-man coverage, and he would throw crappy passes, or get sacked, or make the wrong reads, or throw more crappy passes.
Just because Sanchez isn’t a Pro Bowler doesn’t mean he’s not valuable to the Jets, or that he’s a quality quarterback. He’s not being asked to do much, but he is being asked to do something.
Something that Matt Stafford isn’t able to do at this point in his young, lucrative career.
And that’s all I have to say about that.
Championship Game Picks:
I’m taking the Saints
and the Colts.
Both by at least two touchdowns.
And we should have a really fun Super Bowl.
Although, we’re going to have a fun Super Bowl no matter what …
A Jets-Vikings Super Bowl would be the Brett Favre Revenge Game.
A Colts-Vikings Super Bowl would be the best QB of all time, statistically, against the guy who’s going to beak all his record one day.
And a Jets-Saints Super Bowl would be the best offense in the NFL against the best defense in the NFL.
But what we all really want to see is a Colts-Saints Super Bowl.
The two best QBs in the NFL right now, the two teams that started 13-0.
Two A+ offenses against two pretty good defenses.
An epic game in the making.
Please don’t ruin it, Mark Sanchez.
Last week: 3-1
Playoffs: 3-5
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